Hiding Lies
by PFTones3482
Summary: Sequel to Mermaid Swapping. Dipper and Mabel come to Danville for a visit, and Major Monogram is getting more and more suspicious of Perry, Pinky and Carl. Will they be able to hide Candace's secret when no one else knows that they really need to? Rated for paranoia.
1. Security Breach

**CHAPTER 1- Ok, so I wasn't going to post this for another week or so, but I am FREAKING OUT. I just watched Happy Birthday Isabella! online, and OMG if you haven't seen it yet….biggest surprise EVER doesn't even involve Isabella. I can't stop smiling! **

**Here's the sequel to Mermaid Swapping, and the fourth story in my Secret Life of Candace series. Might change the title….**

**Seriously, my cheeks are starting to hurt. I'm going to go quietly spazz in a corner! AAAAAHHHHHHH!**

**Hem…I don't own Phineas and Ferb or Gravity Falls. **

**(Hopefully I will post the next chapter for my Randy Cunningham story by five today, Eastern Time)**

* * *

GENERAL POV

* * *

Major Francis Monogram yawned widely and picked up his coffee mug from his coaster, taking a huge gulp and effectively burning the inside of his mouth. The man spluttered his coffee back into the mug and set the cup down quickly.

Monogram stood and darted to the office water cooler that was situated near his office. He took several swigs of the cooling water before his mouth stopped feeling like it was on fire.

The man sighed in relief and leaned heavily on the wall behind him, taking a moment to collect his surroundings.

It was five o'clock in the morning, and the only reason that Monogram was here so early was because he was sure that there was something going on between Carl, Perry, and Pinky, and he wanted to know what it was.

And, disappointingly enough, that meant going through each of their work stations.

Monogram tossed his Styrofoam cup into the trash can, briefly making a note to get cardboard ones next time (his wife was cracking down on him about helping the environment) and then headed down the hall to the intern's offices.

Since Carl was the head intern at this division of the OWCA, crazily enough, he had a special cubicle for himself. Monogram slipped into it quietly, stopping dead in his tracks when he spotted Carl himself slumped over his keyboard, fast asleep.

Francis muttered a soft curse. This kid worked too much…then again, some of that was his fault.

Monogram shook his head and peered at the screen of Carl's computer. The screen saver wasn't on, which meant that the boy hadn't been asleep long.

There was a program up on the monitor, but as Monogram took a closer look, he realized that everything was in Carl's infamous shorthand. The man sighed quietly. It would take him forever to decipher this.

He studied the words closely, and before the screen blinked off to show pictures of Carl and his dog Grace bouncing around the screen, the Major managed to understand two words.

Candace and Perry.

* * *

Monogram stepped into Wanda's division of the OWCA, his mind befuddled. Why would Carl be typing something about Candace and Perry? Unless there was a close call again….

Monogram shook his head. Carl would definitely tell him if Candace had somehow managed to figure something out.

However, there was no better place to discover something about someone than that person's sibling. This is why he was headed over to Carla's office now.

"Morning, Wanda," Francis said politely as the woman rounded the corner, a cup of tea in her freshly manicured hand.

"Francis," she said formally, giving him a small smile. "What are you doing here?"

Monogram shrugged. "I came over to discuss something with Carla."

The woman's eyebrows shot up. "My intern? What do you want with her?"

Francis hesitated, chewing his lip ever so slightly. "Well…I have a question for her regarding Carl's birthday."

"Oh. Oh my goodness! Did I forget Carla's birthday?" Wanda asked in horror.

Monogram almost slapped himself. He had totally forgotten that Carl and Carla were twins, and thus would have the same birthdays. "Oh, well…no. It's quite a while from now but uh…I wanted to get a head start."

Admiral Acronym seemed to think this over, and then she nodded. "Her office is down that hall and to the left," she said, pointing.

Monogram nodded his thanks and hurried over to the office. The door was ajar, and Monogram stepped inside without knocking.

Carla leapt from her chair, putting a hand to her pounding heart. "Geez, Major Monogram! You almost gave me a heart attack!"

Monogram inwardly groaned, but put on an apologetic smile. "Sorry about that, Carla. What are you doing here so early?"

Carla gave him a funny look. "Sir, I help monitor all the nocturnal agents. That's why I'm rarely here during the day."

Monogram nodded. "Of course, I had just uh…forgotten. Sorry about the intrusion."

Carla gave him a suspicious look and sank down in her seat. "No problem sir. Have a good day."

Monogram smiled and backed out of the room. "You too."

He stepped back into the hallway, glancing at his watch. It was nearly 6:30, so Monogram had to be fast if he wanted to find anything. On a whim, he poked his head back in Carla's office. "Carla, can you tell me where I might find Agent Pinky?"

Carla's back stiffened ever so slightly, and she turned in her chair, appraising him slowly. "In his office, most likely sir. Though he probably isn't here yet. Why do you need him?"

Monogram hesitated. "Well…I heard that he had Intel on Doofenshmirtz from somebody."

Carla raised an eyebrow. "He had Intel last week, sir. Why would he have more?"

"I don't know. Don't you know better than to question your superiors?" Monogram asked sharply before turning out of the room and shutting the door.

Carla immediately spun towards her phone, yanking it to her ear and pressing speed dial 4, Carl's line. He picked up on the second ring, his voice sleepy. "Carl the intern speaking. How can I help you?"

"Carl? It's me. I think Monogram's onto us. He was snooping around here, trying to find answers," Carla said quietly.

That woke the boy up. "What? Like what about?"

"Well, he just wanted to know where Agent Pinky was, but he seemed annoyed that I was in my office, and he snapped at me about minding my superiors."

Carl shook his head, not that his sister could see it. "That's not like him. He only does that if he's really agitated. You better warn Pinky. I'll call Perry."

Carla nodded. "See ya, Carl."

She didn't even hang up the phone, instead disconnecting her brother and punching in Pinky's number.

The Chihuahua answered his phone from the quiet confines of the upper bathroom in the Garcia-Shapiro household. "Agent Pinky, its Carla," the intern said softly.

Pinky barked gently once, and Carla was suddenly relieved that Carl had gotten her a translator. She had no idea where he'd gotten a second one, but it had come in handy more than once.

"_What's wrong?" _

Carla sighed. "Monogram's seriously onto us. You don't have any incriminating evidence of Candace on your computer do you? Because I think he's going to snoop around your office right now."

Pinky froze, his body for once going still. While there wasn't any evidence lying out in the open, there were emails from Perry, Carl, and Carla that discussed Candace and what she was and knew. And Monogram, though not as skilled at hacking as Carl or Carla, was still pretty good.

"Pinky?" she said.

"_I'm coming down now. Has someone called Perry?" _the dog barked anxiously, jumping into the nearest lair entrance.

"Yeah, Carl is calling him now. You just worry about you, ok Pinky?" Carla said.

"_Yeah. Thanks Carla."_

The dog hung up and sprinted from his very girly, in need of redecorating lair, and into the area where all the field agent's offices were. Since they were field agents, most only used theirs for pictures or files.

Pinky was at his more than most, only because his nemesis was relatively easy to beat (though if she ever did get away with something, it could potentially destroy the world, much like Doofenshmirtz).

Pinky skidded into his cubicle with a sharp bark, a furious scowl replacing his normally placid features.

Monogram, who was hunched over the tiny computer, froze and turned to Pinky, who looked so deadly that Monogram winced. "Uh…Agent Pinky! What a, uh, surprise!" the man stammered, quickly getting up.

Pinky growled and Monogram backed out of the cubicle rapidly. "Sorry, sorry," the man said, quickly darting away.

"_Yeesh," _said a familiar voice. _"I can see why people are so scared of Chihuahua's."_

Pinky turned to look at Perry, who had a nervous smile on his face. _"Perry? Shouldn't you be securing things at your cubicle?" _Pinky asked.

Perry shook his head and stepped into Pinky's cubicle space, glancing around at the walls, which were filled with photos of Isabella, Vivian, Phineas, Ferb, Candace, and even Perry.

"_Nah. I was already there when Carl called me. I have everything saved to a flash drive, and anything sent to me in an email goes on the flash drive and then gets deleted. The drive is in my hat," _he chattered, pointing to the fedora on his head.

Pinky sighed in relief. Though both agents knew that deleting things didn't necessarily get rid of the evidence, they did know that Monogram wasn't technologically inclined enough to get to said evidence.

"_We need to talk to Candace," _Pinky said softly.

Perry nodded. _"I agree. But there's one problem," _he said, his voice laced with both annoyance and happiness, which Pinky hadn't detected earlier.

"_What's that?" _Pinky asked, turning to his computer and seeing that Monogram hadn't been able to hack his email. He quickly plugged in his own flash drive and began moving the evidence of Candace to it, cocking his head towards Perry to let the monotreme know he was listening.

"_Well, Linda got a call last night," _Perry said, leaning over to study a picture of him making a weird face. _"You should get rid of this picture of me. It's awful."_

Pinky turned around to look at his friend, raising an eyebrow. _"Perry. Seriously, focus. And I'm not getting rid of it. It's amusing."_

Perry rolled his eyes and turned his back to the picture. _"Like I said, Linda got a call last night from Stan."_

"_Stan Pines?"_

"_Yup," _Perry said with a nod. _"He's sending the twins down here for a week or two while he fixes up the Mystery Shack. Apparently there was some incident with a body switching carpet or nutty boy band clones…I'm not sure which. But somehow the Shack got all messed up, and Stan doesn't want the twins in the way."_

"_So he's sending them down here?" _Pinky asked, depositing the now full flash drive in his hat and shutting down his computer.

"_Yeah. Linda didn't tell the kids yet. Should be interesting trying to hide this secret."_

"_You know," _Pinky mused, a laugh tinting his voice. _"It's really not a secret to anyone but Monogram anymore."_

Perry nodded, his face grim. _"I know. And I'm ok with that. But it has to stay that way, Pinky. Monogram and Wanda are basically the only people we can't let find out. Well, and our nemeses, of course. Speaking of, I should get going."_

Perry started to leave, but Pinky let out a small growl, his eyes still glued to his computer monitor, which he was inserting a security code into. _"Perry?"_

Perry gulped a little. He was only ever scared of the dog when he growled. _"Yeah, Pinky?"_

Pinky looked up, a smirk on his face. _"Put the picture back."_

Perry scowled, but remounted the dumb picture of him to Pinky's wall.

* * *

**Heehee. Pinky has a funny picture of Perry….one of the reasons I can't STOP SPAZZING is because of Perry…..GAH.**

**You know, I re-read this whole chapter, and I realized that ninety percent of it describes me right now-pounding heart, freaking out, mind blown-wait. That wasn't in there…never mind. **

**I might die until this episode comes out. **

**Review please, and I promise that I will have calmed down next time I post. **

**(And yes, I referenced my story If You Had Five Minutes with Carl's dog. I had to.)**


	2. What to Do?

**CHAPTER 2- Wow. I almost didn't get to update today. Anyone who lives around South Western PA and is getting flooded or got flooded…man, I feel for you. My yard was completely underwater for most of today, my basement flooded, and a bridge collapsed just down the road from me. I live right next to a creek, and the water was so high that it was spilling into my yard. I hope everyone who has been hit by these flash floods is ok!**

**Jakefan: I thought so too, ha-ha. But it is now a series. Congrats on being the first reviewer!**

**Fanatic97: Thank you. I thought they needed some humor to go with the seriousness.**

**Living Encyclopedia: Well thank you (:**

**DF-Chan: Thank you so much! It's funny, because I watched that episode with Pinky today! **

**14AmyChan: Me too. He's really not that bad (just in the movie)**

**TripleAAA1183: Man, I already watched that episode. You'll be more freaked when you see the ending! And I'm going to have this occur before that, because that would mean a completely different reason for the twins having to come to Danville. **

**Fvcutie0028: I know, right? I died of happiness. **

**BTW, for clarification guys, this occurs before Happy Birthday Isabella and Dreamscapers, purely because so much changes in just those two episodes that the story line would have to be altered by a lot. And I mean A LOT. (:**

**I don't own Phineas and Ferb or Gravity Falls. **

* * *

_Perry scowled, but remounted the dumb picture of him to Pinky's wall. _

* * *

CANDACE'S POV

* * *

I was heading down the stairs, brushing my hair and trying not to trip over my own two feet, when my phone buzzed in my pocket, startling me so much that my brush clattered out of my hand and onto the stairs.

I rolled my eyes in annoyance and slipped my phone out of my skirt pocket, leaning over and scooping up my brush at the same time.

I froze when I saw that I had a new text from Perry. The agent rarely texted me unless there was something wrong. The evidence of him texting me was just too incriminating for it to be done often.

I pressed the message icon on my new phone (this made six) and read the message rapidly, my stomach sinking.

_Candace: Monogram's seriously onto us. Pinky caught him snooping in his office this morning. Be careful. Like, really careful. No more talking to us unless you're in your room. Try to stay out of the pool._

I groaned, deleted the message, and tossed the brush onto the couch before heading into the kitchen. Phineas and Ferb were drawing blueprints, and Mom was hanging up the phone. When she saw me, a grin slid across her face.

I sank into my usual chair and raised an eyebrow. "What's up, Mom?"

She sat down next to the boys and me and smiled even more. "Guess who I was just talking to," she said with a smirk.

Ferb glanced up. "Grunkle Stan," he said, a small smile inching across his face.

Mom rolled her eyes. "Ok, Mr. "I hear everything." Yes, I was talking to Stan. But I bet you don't know what about."

Phineas looked up this time, pulling a pencil from behind his ear to make some marks on his blueprint. "He's sending Mabel and Dipper down here for a week, and he just called to tell you they're on their way here, because you talked to him last night."

Mom sighed. "Candace, do you want to add anything?"

I opened my mouth to answer, but my phone buzzed. I glanced down at it briefly, smiling a little when I saw it was from Mabel.

_OMG! We're coming down there to hang out because of a cloned boy band problem! YAY!_

I glanced back up at Mom. "There was some trouble with a boy band, and now they're coming here."

Mom threw her hands in the air. "Why do I even bother?"

Phineas, Ferb, and I chuckled. Mom held up her hand. "I wasn't going to say no to them coming, Candace. What with all they went through last month, and how much they helped us, I couldn't say no."

I gave a thin smile. "Good. Thanks Mom."

Phineas tugged Ferb away from the table, pulling his blueprints after them as the two ran into the backyard.

I shoved away my urge to follow them and see what they were doing, instead standing and heading for the stairs. "I'll be upstairs cleaning my room, Mom," I said.

Mom looked up, her eyes furrowed. "Honey, Mabel and Dipper can share the guest room you know."

I nodded. "I know, Mom. But I think they had fun sharing rooms with us last time. So I figured that they might want to do the same this time."

Mom shrugged. "Well, whatever they want to do is fine. Have fun finding your floor, Candace."

I scowled jokingly. "Thanks a lot, Mom."

I started up the stairs, and she yelled over her shoulder: "If I hear you scream, I'll assume it's you being eaten by the sock pile!"

I rolled my eyes and flicked my hand lightly, focusing my mind on the kitchen sink. A second later, I heard Mom yelp and Phineas and Ferb run into the kitchen.

"Mom! What's-?" Phineas started cracking up, and even though I couldn't see them, I could just picture the scene: Mom soaking wet, the sink faucet still running, and Phineas and Ferb laughing hysterically.

"You teased Candace about her messy room again, didn't you?" Ferb questioned.

I snorted, sprinting the rest of the way upstairs before Mom could call me back down, grateful that my mother had a decent sense of humor.

I shut the door behind me carefully and then sank onto my bed, pulling out my phone and quickly texting Perry. _I'm in my room. Please come explain what happened._

I set my phone aside and glanced around my bedroom. I was really grateful that Monogram had no cameras in the bedrooms of the house, because over the last few weeks (more like a month and a half) I had started putting photos of myself as a mermaid on the walls. And if Major Monobrow, as Dr. D called him, found out that I was a mermaid, it was only a matter of time before he found out that I knew about the OWCA too.

I sighed, leaning back on my bed frame and nearly jumping two feet when Perry and Pinky popped out of nowhere.

"Guys," I said quickly, tucking my legs under me and looking down at the animals in worry. "What happened down there?"

Perry shook his head. _"I've got to go fight Dr. Doofenshmirtz, but Pinky will explain."_

He saluted me and Pinky and then leapt out my window. Having long since grown used to this kind of performance, I turned to Pinky nervously. The dog was pacing my bedroom, his fingers rubbing his chin.

"Pinky?"

Pinky glanced up at me and sighed, quietly restating what had happened that morning in the underground chambers of the OWCA.

I sat back after a good ten minutes, running my fingers through my hair. "Crap. He really wants to know what you guys are hiding, doesn't he?"

Pinky nodded anxiously. _"Hopefully, with Mabel and Dipper around, you'll be more distracted and we won't have to like, talk to you quite as much, so we won't be acting as suspicious."_

I winced. "Sorry, Pinky. I didn't mean to make Monogram suspicious of all of you."

Pinky shook his head. _"It was bound to happen sometime, Candace," _he assured me.

I sighed. "I know, Pinky. I know."

* * *

GENERAL POV

* * *

Dipper rolled his eyes, trying his best to ignore Mabel, who was bouncing up and down on her bus seat while eagerly staring out the window. Finally, the bouncing made him nauseas and he turned to glare at his sister.

"Mabel, would you please quit bouncing up and down?" the boy said, stuffing his book into his backpack.

"Sorry, Dippy," said Mabel, making her brother slap his forehead at the ridiculous nickname. "I'm just so excited to see them again!"

"Mabel," Dipper said with an amused smile, "we video chat them every week or more."

His sister rolled her eyes. "Well yeah, but this will be in person! I'm so glad the bus company let us bring Waddles!"

The twins looked down at the pig, who was nestled comfortably in one of Mabel's old sweaters on the floor.

"Yeah," said Dipper with a chuckle. "I still can't figure out how the bus company was convinced to allow pigs on the bus."

Waddles cracked open an eye and smirked, recalling what had happened that morning.

* * *

_FLASHBACK_

* * *

"Sir, I'm sorry, but the bus company does not allow pets on the bus," the bus attendant said to Grunkle Stan.

"Aw, come on! I paid for an extra ticket for this thing, and the girl won't travel without him!" Stan cried in exasperation.

The man shrugged. "Sorry, sir. Feel free to leave him here until the bus departs, though."

Stan grumbled, but looped Waddles leash around a post and went to find the twins. Waddles quickly pressed a button on his watch, smirking a little as, less than two minutes later, the man's phone rang.

The attendant slipped his phone from his pocket and opened it. "Hello, Bart speaking."

He listened to the person on the other line for a moment, his face steadily paling. His gaze dropped to Waddles, who looked up at the man with an intelligent smile.

"Of course, sir…of c-course," Bart said, hanging up the phone rapidly and grabbing Waddles' leash.

"Come along, sir," the man said formally to the pig, his forehead covered in a sheen of sweat.

Waddles was practically cracking up by the time they found Stan and the twins.

"Sir," Bart said to Stan, quickly handing over the leash, "I received a call from a um, Carlton, who told me that I was permitted to allow this pig on the bus. Sorry for the confusion. And you will be reimbursed for this pig's ticket. Thankyouhaveaniceday."

He darted away as quickly as he could and Waddles sent up a silent thank you to Perry and Carlton-er, Carl.

* * *

_END FLASHBACK_

* * *

"Hey look!" squealed Mabel. "Danville, five miles away!"

She pointed to a sign outside the window and the twins pressed their faces against the glass to see better.

"We'll be there in the next twenty minutes or so," Dipper figured. "We should start getting ready."

The twins eagerly began picking up their things and tossing them into their backpacks. Waddles knew for a fact that these were special backpacks that Dipper had found a few days ago in the Shack, before all the craziness of the termite-like pop boy band stuff happened (long story that happened after Mabel released the guys).

These backpacks could hold everything, and the weight never exceeded five pounds, no matter what was put in them. Waddles was sure that Mabel would have packed Candy and Grenda had Dipper not caught her.

Dipper zipped up his bag and pulled his cell phone out of his vest pocket, dialing the Flynn-Fletcher household.

"It'll be nice to meet all their friends face-to-face," Dipper mused as he listened to the phone ring.

Mabel nodded her agreement, her face stuck up against the window. Dipper smiled as Phineas picked up the phone.

"Hey, Dipper!" Phineas said eagerly. "Where are you guys?"

"About two minutes from the bus depot," Dipper said, glancing out the window. "Can you guys be there in five minutes?"

Phineas chuckled. "We can do better than that buddy. See you soon!"

Dipper hung up the phone with a roll of his eyes, knowing that he should expect some huge project.

Some things never changed.

* * *

**I thought it would be neat to have funky backpacks like that. They can hold anything and never exceed five pounds. How great would that be for school?**

**Again, hope everyone who was flooded or lost power is doing ok!**

**Review please! I have to go shovel out my basement…**


	3. The Return of Aoshima

**CHAPTER 3-Here's number three! Sorry, I've been crazy busy lately, what with cleaning out my basement and Choir Tour coming up soon….YAY!**

**Gamelover41592: I told you in the author's note of the last chapter. **

**14AmyChan: It's not so much about when the meet her as when they start getting to know her. **

**Toystorylover: Thank you, and I did **** I'm on Chapter six already, so yeah…**

**Guest: My basement flooded. And what pony? So lost…**

**Ajustice90: Probably not, although I will most likely have him mention it at some point. **

**Living Encyclopedia: Think about it. Would YOU want to shove your beloved pet into a backpack, not knowing if you'll find him again?**

**OMAC001: Probably not, since this all happens in Danville. But I will definitely mention him at some point!**

**Carifoo2001: Thank you! And you're probably a good writer, too!**

**Krikanalo: Oh, I just made up the backpack. It's not actually in the show (but if I see an episode one day where it is, I am SO calling copyright!)**

**Guest: Seriously though. And you should definitely make an account!**

**Here we go with the chapter. Check out my new Danny Phantom one shot! I don't own Phineas and Ferb or Gravity Falls. **

* * *

_Some things never changed. _

* * *

GENERAL POV

* * *

Dipper hoisted his bag onto his shoulder and glanced around the bus depot curiously. They were in downtown Danville, waiting by the side of the road for Phineas and Ferb.

Mabel was sitting on the ground next to Waddles, her fingers fiddling with the pig's leash.

Dipper glanced up from his 3 book when he heard the sound of…well, he couldn't quite place it. His eyes searched the skyline and his jaw dropped when he saw what he did.

Some….bizarre dolphin like thing with human arms projected out of its sides was flying towards them. Its eyes were windows, with Phineas and Ferb peering out of each one, grinning.

Mabel looked up and gasped. "OMG, how'd they do that?!"

Dipper glanced back at her, confused. "Do what?"

Before she could answer, landing gear sprouted from the dolphin and it touched down smoothly on the pavement.

Phineas and Ferb clambered out a moment later, smiles plastered to their cheeks. "Hey guys," said Phineas, giving Mabel a hug and Dipper a hand shake. "How was your trip?"

Mabel pulled away from Ferb and raised an eyebrow as the silent boy took her brother's hand and shook it. "Um, fine? How's your spiffy new ride?" she asked pointedly.

Phineas laughed. "We were wondering how you'd like it."

Mabel shook her head in amazement. "But how'd you know about that hallucination?"

Phineas and Ferb glanced at each other, and then back at Mabel. "The what now?"

Dipper knew that his sister had to be talking about that time with the Smile Dip, but Phineas and Ferb just looked puzzled.

"Never mind," Dipper said, shaking his head and hoisting his bag. "Let's go."

"You guys don't have anything else?" Phineas asked as he and Ferb led the twins to the dolphin ship thing.

Dipper grinned. "Nah. This bag is Phineas and Ferb/Gravity Falls weird worthy."

Phineas, knowing exactly what he meant, grinned. "Well all right then."

The group climbed onto the dolphin thing, where they were greeted by Candace and Isabella, who the twins hadn't actually met yet.

"Hey guys!" the black haired girl said perkily. "It's nice to finally not see you on an eight inch tall screen."

"You too," said Mabel with a giggle. "You're much taller in person."

"Guys, while this is great, we need to leave," said Phineas. "I don't think we have permission to park here."

Candace rolled her eyes. "You guys never do," she muttered.

Dipper snorted and took a seat next to Candace, who grinned at him warmly and scooted over to make room for Mabel too.

As they set off into the sky, Mabel darted to a window, leaned out of it, and yelled, "The future is in the past! Onwards, Aoshima!" **(I had to)**

Everyone looked at each other. "What on earth is she talking about?" Candace asked.

The Danville gang turned to look at Dipper. He shrugged. "Beats me. Last time she said that she was eating Smile Dip. Mabel, you haven't had Smile Dip recently, have you?"

Mabel turned around with a grin. "Nah. I just wanted to say that."

The kids shrugged and Phineas and Ferb went back to navigating the giant dolphin armed thing. They landed in the backyard of the Flynn-Fletcher household and had all just stepped out of the bizarre travelling machine when a random laser came out of nowhere, hit it, and shrunk it down into a toy sized version of the dolphin.

Mabel and Dipper just stared for a minute, and then looked back up at Phineas and Ferb. "Do uh….do things like that happen a lot?" Dipper asked.

Isabella rolled her eyes. "You wouldn't believe it."

Mabel picked up the toy sized version and studied it. "Hey, I mean, it makes a great action figure," she said with a shrug.

The girl pocketed it and adjusted her backpack on her shoulders.

"So," said Phineas, "there are two options. You guys can share the guest bedroom, or bunk with us the way we did with you at Gravity Falls."

Mabel and Dipper grinned. "Come on. Is that even a contest?" Mabel asked. "Candace, where's your room?"

Candace chuckled and gestured towards the house. "Come on Mabel, Waddles. Let's get you guys settled in. Phineas and Ferb, why don't you show Dipper your room?"

The boys nodded and sprinted into the house, Dipper following them quickly. Isabella chuckled. "Well, I'll let you guys get settled in," she said, starting for the back gate.

Mabel darted over and tugged on Isabella's wrist. "Aw, come on! We just met!"

Isabella giggled and turned around. "Ok, ok, I'll stay."

Candace grinned and took Waddles' leash in her hand, knowing that the pig didn't really need it.

The group headed inside and marched up the steps, passing Phineas and Ferb's room, where the boys were setting up Dipper's stuff on a cot between their beds.

Candace led Mabel into her room, startled for a moment to find Perry on her bed. Mabel squealed in delight.

"Your room is so pink!" she cried in delight.

Candace chuckled and unclipped Waddles from his leash. The pig automatically jumped up onto the girl's bed and settled down next to Perry. Candace smiled and reached behind her door, pulling out a camping cot and setting up on the floor.

"See, we kind of figured that you guys would want to bunk with us," Candace said with a giggle.

Mabel grinned. "But you only found out we were coming this morning. I can't believe you guys were able to get ready this quickly!"

Candace shrugged, wrestling with the bed. "My room wasn't too bad, actually."

Perry hid a snicker, chattering instead. _"Oh, is that what you call the giant mountain of socks that Ferb named Mt. Sock-erest?" _

Candace scowled, allowed herself to trip over the bed, and sent a glass of water from the nearby stand that toppled over flying-directly onto Perry's head. Not a drop of it hit her bed or Waddles, who was doing his best not to crack up.

Faking concern, Candace jumped up in surprise. "Oh no, Perry! Are you ok?"

Perry gave her the tiniest glare and shook his body, spraying water everywhere. Candace sighed, waved a hand, and the fluid gathered up and landed neatly back in the glass.

Mabel was giggling insanely, and Isabella was rolling on the floor laughing. "That never gets old," Isabella declared, standing up.

Candace laughed, fixed the bed, and helped Mabel to set up her things on it. As Candace pulled pillow after pillow from Mabel's bag, she had to look down into it. "Does this thing ever end?" she asked in disbelief.

Mabel shrugged. "Well, yeah. I mean, we couldn't fit the golf cart in there. But if you can get it through the opening, it'll fit."

Isabella frowned. "So, if I hopped in there, it would hold me?"

Mabel grinned. "Yup. But don't do it. It took me an hour to find Dipper."

Everyone started giggling again and the trio headed downstairs, Waddles staying behind to talk with Perry.

"_So," _the pig said, stretching out on the bed, _"how are things going here?"_

Perry sighed and ran a paw through his fur. _"I wish they were better. Monogram is on to us. About Candace knowing."_

Waddles grimaced and sat up, casting a glance at the door. _"That's awful! What does he know?"_

"_Nothing, as far as we know," _Perry said nervously. _"We want it to stay that way. The bedrooms and bathrooms are the only rooms in the house Monogram doesn't have access to. Poor Candace has to keep a low profile."_

"_Maybe I can help now that I'm here," _Waddles offered, leaning on one hoof.

Perry nodded. _"That would be great. Thanks, Waddles."_

The pig nodded. _"Now let's go see what they're up to, shall we?"_

The two animals hopped off the bed and started down the stairs. They arrived in the living room in time to hear Phineas, Ferb, Isabella, and Candace start cackling.

"You…you were a _pig?_" Phineas choked out, wiping a tear from his eye. "Oh, that is so awesome!"

Dipper was scowling and rolling his eyes. "Come on, it was only for a few minutes! And I took a bath afterwards!"

Waddles huffed indignantly and oinked. _"Well that's insulting."_

Perry covered up his snicker of laughter and turned back to the kids. "So where are your parents?" Dipper asked, glancing around the living room.

Phineas smiled. "They'll be here soon. Dad is giving a lecture-and the questions always last forever at the end-and Mom had a band rehearsal, but she should be heading home about now."

The twins nodded and Phineas gestured to the kitchen. "Hungry? I mean, it is after lunch time, and you guys have been on a bus for three or four hours."

Dipper shrugged, but Mabel nodded. "I am starved. As long as we're not eating canned meat, it's all good."

Phineas and Ferb made faces. "Canned meat?" Phineas said. "What in the heck is that?"

Ferb snorted. "Meat that is canned, of course."

Phineas looked at his brother with a grin. "When did you become Mr. Sarcastic?"

The group laughed and headed to the kitchen for something edible.

* * *

**I had to with the Aoshima thing. I had to. **

**And I hope I'll be able to update this again this week. Don't expect any updates after this Thursday. I'm going on tour! YAY! To Virginia, West Virginia, and Maryland. I'm pumped!**

**PM me or review if you want to know where exactly we'll be (Not that anyone ever…does…awkward.)**

**So yeah, review please!**


	4. Because You're DUM

**CHAPTER 4- Probably the last time I update for a week or so. Today's Wednesday, right? Yeah. I'm a bit frazzled this week….**

**Fanatic97: What do you expect? He's Ferb. (:**

**Rachealninja10: Wow. I have never heard that acronym for SPAM before. Ha-ha, but it's so true.**

**FanficChic2: Thank you so much! It's nice whenever someone comes across my stories and really enjoys them! I hope the rest of this story satisfies you!**

**14AmyChan: Doesn't EVERYONE have something against canned meat? Or is it just me? And thanks! It's sure to be awesome! (We're taking two buses, thank God. There's like fifty two of us going)**

**Living Encyclopedia: Aw, thank you so much!**

**So, here's to…my choir tour. And songs. And bonus fudge to anyone who knows what "Cantar una cancion alegre" means! (And yes, it's missing accents)**

**I don't own Phineas and Ferb or Gravity Falls. **

* * *

_The group laughed and headed to the kitchen for something edible. _

* * *

GENERAL POV

* * *

Linda walked into the house half an hour later to find the kids eating a large watermelon. She smiled, set her guitar bag down, and held out her arms.

"All right, I want a hug," she said teasingly, looking at Mabel and Dipper.

The twins laughed and gave their relative a hug.

They were never quite sure what to call Linda; technically, she was their second or third cousin, so they could call her by her first name, but she was also like, thirty years older than them. So it was weird. So the two didn't really call her anything if they could help it. The situation had yet to arise where they had a need to use her name.

"When did you kids get here?" Linda asked, releasing the duo from her death grip.

Dipper glanced at the clock on the kitchen wall. "Like forty five minutes ago or so."

Linda nodded and stuck her guitar into its place in the hall closet. "What have you guys been doing?"

Phineas gestured to the melon in front of him. "Eating watermelon. It was in the fridge, and Dipper and Mabel were hungry. It was ok to eat it, right Mom?" he asked, not concerned at all.

Linda smiled. "So long as you kids didn't spoil your appetite. I'm making fried chicken for dinner, with mac n' cheese."

Phineas and Ferb gasped in delight and Isabella giggled. "Wish I could stay, Mrs. Flynn-Fletcher, but I've got to go. See ya guys tomorrow!" she said with a wave, exiting out the back.

"Bye Isabella!" Linda called.

She looked back at Phineas and Ferb's puppy dog faces and she rolled her eyes. "Boys, there's still two hours until dinner. Go do something."

Phineas and Ferb sighed and stepped into the backyard with Dipper, Mabel, and Candace. "Is your mom's chicken really that good?" Mabel questioned.

The Flynn-Fletcher siblings just stared at her in disbelief and Mabel held up her hands. "I was just wondering."

Phineas chuckled and shook his head. "Nah, it is that great. It's like, our favorite thing our mom makes."

"Except her pie," Ferb reminded him.

Phineas grinned. "Yeah. Her pie is great! She's had a lot of practice making it."

Dipper and Mabel raised their eyebrows at this, but said nothing. "So, what are we going to do while we're here?" Dipper asked, leaning back in the grass.

Phineas and Ferb glanced at one another, and then both boys looked at Candace. She shrugged. "What do you guys want to do?" she asked the twins.

Mabel looked at her brother and then back at the siblings. "I mean, we've never been here before, so you guys know all the fun stuff."

Candace rolled her eyes. "Then based on the reviews of people who live here, you're going to be spending a lot of time in this backyard."

The kids giggled and Phineas shrugged. "I mean, we can take you guys to the museum, show you around town, and introduce you to all of our friends, if that's ok with you."

Mabel and Dipper grinned. "That's great!" Mabel squealed. "Maybe we can go to the museum tomorrow, and then have the rest of the week to do whatever else."

Phineas nodded and Candace raised an eyebrow. "I swear you take everyone who visits us to the museum. I don't get it."

Phineas smiled widely. "Candace, we have had some pretty cool adventures there."

Candace rolled her eyes. "Yeah. Cause almost getting eaten by a T-Rex is cool."

They chuckled and sat in the grass, chatting for almost two straight hours about things to do over the next week, and things that had happened since they had all last seen each other. When Linda came out to announce that dinner was ready, everyone was kind of surprised.

"Wow, that was a quick two hours!" Dipper commented.

Phineas nodded as he stood up, dusting off his shorts. As Ferb helped Mabel of the grass, the triangular boy commented, "It's weird. It's like everything in Danville happens in fifteen minute time spans. I don't get it. Maybe it's something to do with the city power lines."

Dipper shrugged. "That's ok. Sometimes I feel like all of our adventures happen in half an hour."

The kids trooped inside to find their father setting the table. Phineas grinned. "Dad, when did you get home?"

Lawrence looked up with a wry smile. "A good hour ago, Phineas. Linda said that you kids were having fun in the backyard, so I didn't bother you."

He hugged Mabel and gave Dipper a firm hand shake, smiling warmly at the two. "Are you kids ready for some of my wife's famous fried chicken?"

Mabel's eyes widened. "Is it really famous?" she asked in awe.

Dipper chuckled. "No, Mabel, it's just a metaphor."

"Actually," Phineas said, seating himself at the table, "it was almost true. Mom entered a contest and won an honorable mention."

Linda rolled her eyes as she put the steaming pan on the table top. Ferb grabbed the mac n' cheese and added it to the table. "Which is nothing," the woman said in annoyance, nodding to her son as he sat back down. "Honorable mention is just the judges way of saying they feel bad for you."

Candace snorted and leaned over to Mabel. "She's still kind of bitter about it," she whispered.

Mabel raised an eyebrow with a half-smile. "No, really? I hadn't guessed."

Candace snickered and helped herself to the chicken and macaroni. In minutes, everyone was quietly chewing, and Dipper and Mabel looked like they had won the lottery.

"This only got an honorable mention?" Dipper finally said.

"I know, right?" Phineas said. "That other chicken must have been, like, magic or something."

The others nodded in agreement, and not another word was said, except for people to "Please pass the (insert food name here)."

The kids went to bed afterwards, changing into their pajamas and brushing their teeth, all five of them crowded into the same bathroom.

"You know," Candace commented, after almost spitting into Ferb's hair, "there's another bathroom. Why on earth didn't we use it?"

There was a silence, and then Phineas sighed. "Because we're DUM!"

The kids all looked at him and he grinned. "Inside joke."

That ended that conversation, and eventually, the bathroom was left empty as the children went to their appropriate bedrooms.

Mabel snuggled into her cot, Waddles curled up at her feet. Candace settled into her bed, yawned, and flipped off the light switch. "Night, Mabel."

Mabel yawned widely, and the tired sound penetrated her words. "Night, Candace."

Phineas and Ferb clambered into their beds, being careful not to accidentally step on Dipper's cot as they did so. The boy had already taken off his hat and pulled the blankets up to his chin. His arms were stretched under his head and he nodded to the boys.

"Night Phineas, night Ferb," he said sleepily.

Phineas smiled. "Night, Dipper and Ferb!"

Ferb nodded to the two boys and pulled out a book light. Phineas turned off the large light and the only light in the room came from the soft glow of Ferb's itty bitty lamp. Even that was shut off fifteen minutes later, as Ferb found himself too tired to read.

Perry snuck into the room, looked between the three boys, cocked his head, and then hopped onto Phineas' bed. He would go to Ferb's in the middle of the night, he decided, and then tomorrow start on Dipper's bed, if the boy would let him.

Perry yawned, curled up under Phineas' arm, and fell asleep immediately.

Linda and Lawrence peeked in each of the rooms before they went to bed, and the adults smiled. "Looks like they were too tired to stay up and chat," Linda murmured softly.

Lawrence chuckled and shut the door to Candace's room. "Believe me, that's a good thing."

* * *

The next morning, Dipper was the first up. He kept quiet, trying not to wake up Phineas and Ferb, got dressed, and then snuck downstairs.

He paused for a moment, and then, recalling where the dishes were kept, pulled out a bowl and spoon.

The boy frowned after a moment, not sure exactly where to find the cereal. Obviously, the milk was in the fridge, but there were at least a dozen cupboards, and Dipper didn't feel comfortable going through them all.

"Looking for something?" said a soft British voice.

Dipper spun around and put a hand to his pounding heart, scowling at Ferb, who looked like he was trying not to smile. "Yeesh, man, a little warning next time!"

Ferb smiled vaguely and opened the cupboard at his right, revealing five boxes of cereal. Dipper smiled sheepishly. "Thanks, Ferb."

Ferb nodded and got himself his own bowl and cereal brand, and the two sat munching in silence. Dipper hesitated. He had always felt a bit awkward around Ferb. Phineas and Candace could read Ferb like a book, and so could Isabella, apparently. Even Mabel was getting pretty good at it. But Dipper had a hard time talking to someone who rarely talked.

Still, he tried.

"So, uh…what are you doing up? I didn't wake you, did I? It's only seven."

Ferb gave a small smile and shook his head. "This is the time we normally get up. Phineas will be up soon. You?"

Dipper shrugged. "I just…I had a hard time sleeping."

Ferb looked concerned for a moment. "Was it the cot?"

Dipper looked at him in confusion. "Was it-? Oh, no! No, the cot is fine, man. I just…"

He trailed off, staring at his bowl intently, and Ferb studied the boy in front of him slowly. "You're a bit homesick, aren't you?"

Dipper gave a thin smile and looked up. "That obvious, huh? I mean, it's nothing against you guys. I felt the same way when Mabel and I first started staying at the Mystery Shack. I'll get over it. But uh…if you could not tell anyone, that'd be great. It's a little embarrassing. I mean, I'm 12, for Pete's sake."

Ferb shrugged. "Well, if you need to talk, I'm obviously all ears."

Dipper raised an eyebrow and studied Ferb a little more closely. The boy had the smallest smile twitching at the corner of his mouth, and Dipper realized that Ferb obviously knew that he was quiet, and he knew that everyone else thought it was different. And yet he didn't seem to care.

Dipper gave a grin. "Thanks, man."

Ferb tipped an imaginary hat as Phineas came thundering down the stairs. "Anytime."

* * *

**Yay, Ferb and Dipper bonding! Ferb is like, one of my favorite Phineas and Ferb characters ever. Yeah…**

**So not much really happened in this chapter, but don't worry. The next chapter will have…well, not so much action as a "Holy crap," moment. Yeah. **

**I won't be updating this until probably next Thursday. Tomorrow is going to be spent packing and Friday starts my choir tour! And then next Saturday I leave for our Mission Trip in Minnesota. Shout out to anyone who lives there!**

**So yeah, probably only one more update this month.**

**And my inside joke...ha-ha. Oh Creation. **

**But review please, and I'll do my best!**


	5. It's Harder to Lie Than It Looks

**CHAPTER 5- Hey guys! I'm only on for a little bit to upload this chapter! I just got back from tour and I'm leaving tomorrow for our Minnesota mission trip, so I won't update again for about another week. **

**Rachealninja10: I like breaking the fourth wall. I do it in almost every one of my stories (:**

**Fanatic97: What, you mean like this chapter? There's not a lot of **_**action,**_** you know, in this story, but there is a lot of WTF? moments.**

**Guest: Wait, wait, wait, what catchphrase? I am so lost…**

**14AmyChan: Cereal is good. **

**FanficChic2: Actually, it's in this chapter. And thanks, I hope I'll have fun too!**

**IWANTDIPPER: Very good! Here is your virtual fudge *hands fudge over***

**I don't own Phineas and Ferb or Gravity Falls.**

* * *

_Ferb tipped an imaginary hat as Phineas came thundering down the stairs. "Anytime."_

* * *

GENERAL POV

* * *

The trip to the museum was exciting, to say the least.

It started out rather boring, if anyone was to admit it. The kids (Isabella, Baljeet, and Buford included) biked down like always and locked their bikes in front of the museum.

Isabella was shaking her head. "I can't believe you guys managed to fit your bikes into your bags!"

Baljeet shook his head. "Where did you even acquire those bags?" he asked, wrapping his helmet around his handlebars.

Mabel looked at Dipper and the boy shrugged said backpack onto his shoulders. "They were in the basement of the Mystery Shack."

Phineas frowned. "I didn't know the Mystery Shack had a basement."

Mabel grinned. "Neither did we."

Phineas and Ferb chuckled and led everyone into the museum.

What should have been an easy trip to the museum turned into an all-out Slushy Dawg war. When the kids stumbled out of the museum almost two hours later, they were covered in mustard, ketchup, relish, and other condiments. Baljeet had a hot dog bun on his head, and Dipper had to pull two hot dogs from his hat.

They had of course helped to clean up the mess they made, but Phineas was still confused.

"I don't understand," he commented as they hopped on their bikes and pulled their helmets on. "How on earth did you two," he said, gesturing to Buford and Baljeet, "manage to get into a hot dog fight?"

"The nerd started it," Buford protested.

Baljeet slapped his forehead, leaving a smear of mustard when he pulled his hand away. "How on earth did I start it? You are the one who put the hot dog down my pants!"

Buford sniffed. "Yeah, but you're the one who overreacted and threw one at my face."

Mabel and Dipper were having a difficult time not cracking up, and Isabella grinned at them. "See what we go through every day?" she teased.

Buford and Baljeet looked at her indignantly. "I resent that!" Baljeet said.

The kids all burst into laughter, and Baljeet had no choice but to join them with a sheepish grin.

They started peddling home and Dipper shook his head. "What I don't understand is why they didn't kick you guys out for that."

Ferb snorted. "They'd have a difficult time doing that, considering half the exhibits have been donated by our family."

"Mom and Dad run an antique shop," Phineas clarified, "and whenever they find something super valuable, they always donate it to the museum. We've also fixed up a couple of things."

Dipper shook his head in amazement. "Wow. You guys really get around."

Candace rolled her eyes. "Yes, yes they do."

They took the long way back to their house, showing Dipper and Mabel different parts of the city, like the mall, the park, and the newly acquired lake (Obviously courtesy of Phineas and Ferb).

"So wait," Dipper said, trying to keep up. "You guys accidentally created a man-made lake with a giant ball of water?"

Phineas grinned. "Yeah. It was neat. It took a while to figure out how to keep the water molecules together, but we managed."

Baljeet smirked. "Yes. And we kicked physics camp's butt!"

Everyone looked at the nerd in a funny way and he grinned. "What? I can now one-up them next summer!"

Buford rolled his eyes. "Wow. Nerds one up-ing each other. I've heard it all, man."

The kids pulled into the driveway laughing and Isabella smiled, taking off her helmet and clipping it around her handlebars. "Hey, who wants to come over to my house and go swimming?"

Candace stiffened ever so slightly as the rest of the kids nodded in agreement. "I…I'm gonna pass, Isabella."

Isabella frowned. "But why?"

The red head sighed. "I'm not uh…not feeling too hot. I think I'll lie down for a while."

Phineas and Ferb looked at her in worry. "Do you want us to stay with you, Candace?" Phineas asked worriedly. "I mean, Mom and Dad aren't home, so you'll be by yourself."

Candace smiled gently. "That's fine. You guys go have fun, ok?"

The boys glanced at each other but nodded slowly. "All right," Phineas said with a hesitant smile. "Call us if you feel worse."

Candace gave the boys a smile, her gut twisting at her lie. "You two are great. Have fun, you guys!" she said, trying to put a sick look on her face as she walked into the house.

She slumped up the stairs to her room, hating herself more with every step.

* * *

Monogram paced slowly in the underground OWCA lair, rubbing his mustache gently and staring at the video monitor in front of him.

He watched as the kids in the front yard of the Flynn-Fletcher household talked quietly, and then made their way over to the Garcia-Shapiro home to-Monogram assumed-go swimming, based on the towels the kids had gone inside to get.

He sighed, wishing that this secret video monitor had sound. But, since he couldn't trust Carl or Carla right now, apparently, and he had no idea how to work with a sound system, he was forced to deal with just video feed.

What were those kids doing? The kids had obviously asked Candace to go swimming with them, but she had objected. Now, Monogram knew that most teenagers weren't keen on hanging out with their little siblings, but he also knew that Candace was polite enough to stay when they had company.

She was either sick, or was hiding something. Or both, the Major mused. Whatever was going on with Carl, Perry, and Pinky, Monogram was sure that it had something to do with Candace. He didn't know what, but it seemed the most likely conclusion.

He sighed and sat down in front of the screen, staring at the footage for a long time. He hadn't been able to get access inside the house, because he was sneaking around, so he was forced to deal with yard views.

The man leaned forward as he watched the kids jump and splash in the pool, trying to read lips, something he wasn't good at at ALL. Maybe it had something to do with his mustache.

"Sir, where did you want me to put the papers on Doctor- what is going on here?" Carl asked in disbelief as he took in the sight of what his boss was doing.

Francis jumped to his feet. "Carl! What are you doing here?"

Carl narrowed his eyes slowly, not bothering to answer the man's question. "Sir, you know this is illegal, right? Our cameras are licensed, and the government knows about them. I doubt they know about these," he said angrily, gesturing to the monitors.

Monogram winced, and then hardened his gaze. "Carl, you do not question your superiors."

Carl scowled and set the papers in his hand down, crossing his arms. "No, sir, you shouldn't question your top intern and mechanics guy. Because believe me, if you don't get rid of those cameras, I'll tell Agent P and Agent Pinky that you have them, and you'll have lost two of your best agents and two of your best interns."

Monogram felt his face pale. "Are you black mailing me?"

Carl smirked. "Perhaps I am, sir."

As the boy turned to go, Monogram managed to splutter out another question. "Why do you care so much if I have these cameras?"

Carl flinched and turned to glare at his superior. "Gee, sir. Ever hear of privacy? The cameras we have are enough. And I really don't want to get arrested for covering for your lying butt."

The intern stalked out to go call Perry, leaving a speechless Major behind him.

* * *

Candace paced back and forth in her room anxiously. Perry, Pinky, and Waddles all stood in front of her, their eyes worried. Pinky was twisting his hat in his paws and Perry kept adjusting his like it was going to fly away.

Waddles was just rubbing his chin thoughtfully, his eyes on Candace as she moved across her room.

Finally, Candace threw her hands in the air. "I don't know what to do!" she cried, glancing briefly at her open door, grateful that everyone was over at Isabella's house right now and that her parents were at the antique shop.

"Monogram gets closer to figuring this out every day, and now I have to make up lies about being sick so that I don't have to go swimming at Isabella's! It makes me feel so terrible!" she groaned, flopping onto her bed and burying her head into her pillow.

Perry glanced anxiously at the two agents next to him, who looked back in worry. _"Candace," _he chattered softly. _"We're going to figure out how to get him off your tail…no pun intended."_

Candace sighed. "But what if we can't? I don't want you guys to get sent away," she said softly. "Waddles…even you might, because I'm related to Mabel and Dipper."

The pig winced and rubbed his head wearily. He oinked softly and Pinky translated. _"He hopes that it won't come to that."_

Candace snorted harshly. "We all do, Waddles."

She groaned and rolled over so that she was staring at the ceiling, her arm thrown across her forehead. "I don't get it. You guys may be secret agents, but that doesn't necessarily mean that I'm going to get attacked by some insane evil scientist! Why is Monogram so freaking harsh?"

Perry gave a small smile. _"He's worked hard to protect the agency, Candace."_

Candace threw her hands up in the air and sat up, chucking her pillow across the room and hitting the door. "But I'm not going to jeopardize it! I haven't yet, and I've known you guys were agents for almost two years!"

A loud gasp and thud was heard from the door and Candace and the agents whipped their heads around to stare in shock at the source of the noise.

* * *

**Boo yah! Go Carl! I needed him all sassy like…ha-ha. You notice he's becoming more and more sarcastic in every episode? It's kind of funny…**

**And bam. There's the sneak peek that I had! Sadly, you won't get the next chapter until probably two Monday's from now…so that's like, ten or more days from now. **

**Onwards to my Mission Trip! Woo-hoo!**

**Review while I'm gone! (And I'm thinking about another one-shot companion for this story line, when I'm done with this installment. IDK if I'll do it yet)**


	6. Explanations

**CHAPTER 6-I'M BAAAACCCCCKKKKKK! Minnesota freaking ROCKED. I had the best time ever! But I missed updating, so here I am again!**

**14AmyChan: Actually, that was an idea I had for a one-shot….**

**Fanatic97: It's ok, because I came back! See, you lived. **

**IWANTDIPPER: Calmin' down now, calmin' down. **

**Living Encyclopedia: I don't think there's an 'e' on the end….**

**Rachealninja10: Yes, yes he has.**

**FanficChic2: Thank you, I did. And I really hope that you didn't die. **

_**Migweech,**_** guys for waiting patiently for this chapter! I think this is the longest I've gone without updating…I could be wrong on this, though. (Bonus cookies to those who know what Migweech means)**

**I don't own Phineas and Ferb or Gravity Falls. **

* * *

_A loud gasp and thud was heard from the door and Candace and the agents whipped their heads around to stare in shock at the source of the noise. _

* * *

GENERAL POV

* * *

Candace leapt to her feet, putting her hands up quickly. "Dipper, no, it's not what you think!"

The boy slowly cocked his head, his eyes never leaving the secret agents behind Candace. "Isn't it?" he said, his face moving to look at her, his eyes filled with disappointment.

He shook his head and darted from the room, leaving the book he had dropped on the floor.

Candace winced and sank onto the edge of her bed, looking at the agents in worry. "What do we do?" she asked softly.

Perry sighed and looked at Pinky. _"Candace, I think the only thing we can do is tell him the truth. Because if we told Monogram…it would give you away, too."_

Pinky and Waddles nodded in agreement and Candace sighed, standing up and picking the book up off the floor. "You guys stay here. I'll go talk to him."

The three nodded and Candace slipped out of her bedroom, peering into each of the rooms until she found Dipper sitting in the study, his knees drawn to his chin.

She rapped lightly on the door and stepped into the room as the boy looked up, his eyebrows drawn. "Dipper? Come on, we need to talk."

Dipper scowled and sat up straight, yanking his book from Candace's hands before she could react. "What about?" he asked, tucking the book into his vest. "About how you lied to us? How Waddles lied to Mabel and me? What about, Candace? Because I want to know why."

He crossed his arms and glared at her and Candace felt herself freeze, her mouth hanging open as she stared at the disbelief and anger in the boy's eyes. "Dipper you don't…you don't get it," she finally said, lowering herself into one of the other chairs in the room.

Dipper rolled his eyes. "Oh really. How about, Waddles has lied to my sister's face, not to mention almost let us get eaten by a pterodactyl, and you just lied to your own brothers! I knew you weren't sick!"

Candace was angry now. "Want to know what you forgot? You forgot that if Waddles told you guys who he was that he'd get relocated and Mabel would be heartbroken. You forgot that you two are the most capable kids I've ever met outside my brothers and their friends and that you could have handled yourself. You forgot that Waddles was stuck in a ditch with Stan. You forgot that I'm a freaking mermaid and the reason I lied is because Perry's boss is onto me, and if he finds out I know Perry and Pinky are goners!"

She collapsed backwards into her seat, trembling, while Dipper stared at her, his face pale.

Candace shook her head and stood up, moving to the door. "Whatever, Dipper. Whatever."

Dipper stood up quickly. "Wait. Candace, I…I'm sorry. I didn't know."

Candace turned and gave him a look. The boy winced. "I…I was just…"

The girl sighed and walked back over to him. "Upset, I know. So was Phineas when he found out."

Dipper looked at her in confusion. "Phineas knows? I thought…"

Candace shook her head. "Phineas knew. But he, and everyone else but me, got their memories wiped so we could keep Perry."

Dipper shook his head slowly. "I don't get it. Why do you know?"

Candace smiled thinly and sat back down, as did Dipper. "The reason I became a mermaid, Dipper, is because of Perry's nemesis that he fights. Perry found out about me two or three weeks later, and at the same time I saw him as an agent. We didn't talk for a while, but when we did, I agreed to keep it a secret, since I had been already."

She frowned and ran a hand through her hair. "I realized a couple of weeks later that I could understand him, so that made it easier for us to talk. I kept his secret for over a year, eventually letting Pinky in on it."

Candace bit her lip and glanced out the window. "And then this whole crazy thing with another dimension happened and I found out that one of the interns that works for Perry's organization, the OWCA, knew I was a mermaid, knew that I knew about Perry. But he agreed to keep that a secret too. So it was all good for a while.

"Then a few weeks ago, I was hit with another of Dr. D's-Perry's nemesis- machines. It made me forget who I was and switch places with another mermaid. We all got back to normal, you know, but Perry's boss, Major Monogram, started to get suspicious of all the sneaking around that Carl, Perry, Pinky, and Carl's twin Carla were doing. Perry got a call this morning that Monogram put up secret, illegal cameras to try and figure out what was going on. Carl stopped him, but he was spying on you guys for a while after I left. I left because…"

"Because he can't know," Dipper finished softly, playing with his shirt.

Candace nodded. "Exactly."

Dipper pondered this for a moment, and then looked up in horror. "Oh no! Candace, we were talking about why you didn't want to go swimming. We couldn't figure it out, since we all knew that you were a mermaid so that didn't matter."

Candace shook her head quickly. "It's ok. Carl said that Major Annoying didn't have any microphones hooked up to the cameras, so he couldn't hear you."

Dipper sank back with relief. "Good. Candace I'm…I'm sorry. What are we going to do now? You're not going to have Major…whatever erase my memory are you?"

Candace sighed and shook her head again, much to the boy's relief. "No. We can't. It's hard enough sneaking around him, but memory erasing without him knowing is nearly impossible. He finds out that you know, he finds out that I know."

Dipper nodded slowly. "I can't tell Mabel, can I?"

Candace smiled gently. "Afraid not, buddy. But hey, she's already super close to Waddles, so I doubt it'll matter."

Dipper smiled and stood up, rubbing his neck. "So uh…now what?"

"Now you lay low. And maybe you could help me keep this from Major Monobrow," Candace suggested. "I'll let Carl know you know."

Dipper grimaced. "Will he be ok with that?"

Candace smirked. "He probably already knows. This room is under surveillance, and he has been keeping an eye on the video feed, haven't you Carl?" she said, directing her gaze to where she knew the hidden camera was.

Her phone rang a minute later and Candace put it on speaker. "Yeah, yeah, it's fine Candace, so long as he keeps it as much of a secret as you have," said Carl's voice.

Dipper nodded furiously. "Of course I will, sir!"

Carl chuckled. "No need for the sir, Dipper. Carl will do it just fine. Thanks guys."

Candace smiled. "Thank you, Carl!"

She hung up the phone and stuck it back in her pocket, looking at Dipper curiously. "So why did you come back home?" she asked, heading back for her room with Dipper following closely.

Dipper shrugged. "Mabel left her goggles in her bag and I offered to go back and get them, since I'm not the biggest fan of swimming. It took me a good five minutes to find them, but I got them!" he said triumphantly, pulling the goggles from his pocket.

Candace slapped her forehead. "And I was talking really loudly, so you came to investigate. Wow, some secret agent I'd make."

Dipper smiled. "Well, based on what I just heard, I'd say that you'd make a pretty good one."

Candace laughed and stepped back into her room, where Perry, Pinky, and Waddles all looked up expectantly. She glanced down at Dipper with a raised eyebrow and he smiled sheepishly.

"Sorry, I over reacted guys. Candace explained…well, everything."

The agents smiled and nodded to him, and then glanced at Candace. "I talked to Carl, and he said he won't tell Monogram," she said.

The agents looked visibly relieved and Pinky glanced at Dipper. _"He won't tell anyone, will he?"_

Waddles snorted something and Perry gave a chuckle, translating for Candace. _"He's pretty indignant about that accusation. He won't tell, Pinky."_

Candace grinned and glanced over at Dipper. "Your pig apparently trusts you a lot."

Dipper ducked his head, hiding a smile, and held up the goggles. "I should uh….get these to Mabel. See ya!"

He darted from the room, leaving Candace shaking her head, a smile on her face.

* * *

Dipper stepped into Isabella's yard, pondering everything he had just learned, in time to get soaked by a water gun that Mabel held in her hands. He looked up, spluttering. "Seriously? I brought you your goggles and this is the thanks I get?" he asked, grateful that he had left his book back in his room before coming back.

Mabel squealed. "Yay, my goggles! Give 'em here!"

Dipper rolled his eyes. "Um…no."

He darted away from her, holding her goggles just out of his sister's reach as she chased him around the yard.

Finally, he stopped about two feet from the pool and held up his hands. "Fine, fine, you can have them," he said, ignoring the giggling crowd behind him who seemed to know what was coming next.

Mabel smiled. "Thanks, Dipper."

She stepped forward and in one move, Dipper tackled her into the pool. The twins surfaced, one laughing, and one looking very upset. "You are so going to get it," Mabel growled, dunking her very wet brother underwater.

Dipper pulled her under after him and Phineas, Ferb, and the rest of the kids shrugged and joined in, Ferb dunking Phineas and Buford, of course dunking Baljeet. Isabella waited for the perfect moment, and then dunked all four boys at the exact same time.

They came up in stunned surprise, staring at Isabella. "How on earth did you just dunk all of us?" Phineas gasped.

Mabel and Dipper turned to look at the group in confusion. Isabella smirked.

"Aw, come on. I didn't get my Extreme Water Dunking Patch for nothing."

Dipper raised an eyebrow. "They've got some really weird patches."

* * *

**Yes, yes they do.**

**So hey, new one-shot idea: Since Stacy knows about Perry now, I thought it would be interesting to have a one-shot where they figure out how to tell Candace that she knows (Staying with the story line of this series, of course). Tell me what you think!**

**Review please!**


	7. Why Do I Bother?

**CHAPTER 7- Hey guys! I'm here with the next chapter! (What would you do if I said I had the next two done as well?)**

**14AmyChan: Dipper's fun to mess with (:**

**Krikanalo: I plan on giving that one-shot a try, and I've been thinking of another, too. **

**Weirdgirl332: Aw, thank you so much! Comments like that make my day!**

**Guest: O.O Wow. That would make an epic one-shot! Mind if I give that a shot? ;)**

**FanficChic2: You are just that awesome. But being psychic would be cool, too. **

**I don't own Phineas and Ferb or Gravity Falls. (I mean, no dip, Sherlock)**

* * *

_Dipper raised an eyebrow. "They've got some really weird patches."_

* * *

GENERAL POV

* * *

The next few days passed quietly. Candace, with the help of Dipper, continued to hide her secret as best she could from the cameras that were in and around the house.

It wasn't easy, because she couldn't keep pulling a "sick card" whenever the kids wanted to go swimming, but luckily for Candace (she couldn't believe she was saying that) the boys and the other kids had gone back to building giant things in the backyard.

One day it was a house sized-replica of Van Gogh's "Starry Night" made entirely of macaroni noodles, the next it was a fire-breathing dragon-unicorn that flew them around town in a chariot (take a wild guess as to who had a big hand in that project).

Today was the third day since the twins had arrived, and Candace couldn't care less what the boys were doing. But in fact, they weren't doing anything.

She peered out the window and had to do a double take before leaning out it and yelling down to the seven kids gathered in the yard. "Hey! What are you guys doing?"

Phineas looked up and shrugged. "Nothing, right now. We can't think of what to do. What were you going to do, Candace?"

Candace hesitated. "I was actually going to go to the beach with Stacy."

The kids all glanced at one another and grinned. "Can we come?" Isabella asked hopefully.

Candace sighed and texted Stacy rapidly, though she knew her friend would be fine with it. She was easy going like that. Sure enough, Stacy responded that it would be perfectly fine for the kids to tag along.

"It's fine with me and Stacy," Candace called out the window.

She heard the cheering and gave a small smile. A tug on her skirt as the kids got ready to go made her look down to see Perry.

"_Hey, Carl wants your necklace so that he can add the rest of the animal translator qualities into it."_

Candace blinked and removed the silver fedora charm from her neck slowly. "Why does he want to do that?"

Perry shrugged and carefully put her necklace into his hat. _"Well, you did say yesterday that you wished you could understand Waddles."_

Candace gave a small smile. "As long as I get it back," she said, going to her closet and pulling out her beach towel and bag.

Perry tilted his hat. _"Carl promised me he would have it back to you by no later than the end of tomorrow. Keep in mind he has to do this behind Monogram's back."_

Candace shook her head, a smile gracing her face. "Wow, Perry. I never realized how rebellious you were until recently. Tell Carl thank you."

Perry grinned at her and vanished out her window, seconds before Phineas and Ferb ran into her room, their swim trunks on in place of their regular shorts. "Ready to go, Candace?" Phineas asked eagerly.

Candace shrugged. "I suppose. We have to wait for Stacy to get here, though," she told her brothers as she followed them downstairs.

Phineas nodded. "That's ok; Baljeet and Buford had to run home to grab their swim trunks, so we have to wait for them, too."

Ten minutes later, the large group biked out of the Flynn-Fletcher driveway and towards the beach, Candace and Stacy at the back of the group. "So," Stacy said, tucking a wild piece of hair behind her ear and carefully maneuvering her bike with one hand, "will we be able to get that private spot on the beach?"

Candace smirked. "Considering Jenny just got a job as a lifeguard there and I called her earlier to tell her we were coming? No, it shouldn't be a problem at all."

Stacy raised an eyebrow. "Why did Jenny get a job as a life guard?"

Candace laughed. "Isn't it obvious? It makes it easier for her to clean up the beach. And besides, she knows that with me there we don't really need a life guard in our area, so that means she has less to worry about."

Stacy gave a nod. "Makes about as much sense as anything."

Candace snorted. "Boy, I'll say."

The rest of the ride involved showing Dipper and Mabel yet more things that were on the way to the beach (like they hadn't seen enough). Therefore, it took much longer than usual to arrive at the beach.

The group locked their bikes, grabbed their things, and strolled down the beach to meet Jenny. She glanced up from where she was rubbing sunscreen onto a toddler's back and grinned brightly.

She patted the little boy on the head, stood, and walked over to the group, rubbing the leftover sunblock into her palms. "Hey guys. Candace, I made sure you guys had that private corner you asked for," she said, pointing off towards a discreet location located underneath numerous amounts of trees.

Very few people went into that part, because the water under the trees was supposedly muddy. But thanks to Candace and her powers, it was probably now the cleanest water in the area. Only a few brave souls had managed to figure that out, and they weren't too keen on letting anyone else in on their private spot either.

Candace nodded. "Thanks, Jenny. What were you doing?" she asked, gesturing to the kid Jenny had been sun blocking.

Jenny smiled. "Oh, his mom has like six kids. I offered to help put on sunscreen, because it takes forever."

The kids smiled. "Oh, by the way, Jenny, these are our cousins, Dipper and Mabel," Candace said, gesturing to the two. They smiled and waved and Jenny nodded back.

"I'll come by every now and then to make sure you guys are doing ok," Jenny said, "and don't worry; I'll do my best to keep everyone away from that area."

"Thanks so much, Jenny," everyone chorused.

They walked towards the secret spot, Jenny calling after them, "Make sure you throw away your garbage and recycle everything else before you leave!"

Candace chuckled and glanced at Mabel, who was at her side. "She's very environmentally friendly. Don't get on her bad side that way."

Mabel laughed and the kids set up their stuff in the little clearing, glancing around as they did so.

Phineas, Ferb, and their friends had been there multiple times to swim, but Mabel and Dipper were seeing it for the first time. Now that they were in the little area, Dipper could see that the trees actually went into the water, providing a very tall wall that went out for a good fifteen feet before stopping.

He looked over at Candace with a sly grin. "How long did it take you guys to find this spot?" he asked.

Candace snorted. "A while. There were a few close calls too, but eventually Jordan helped us find this spot."

Dipper and Mabel glanced at one another, then at the rest of the kids. "Who's Jordan?" they asked.

Phineas and Ferb looked at each other, then the rest of their friends, and then Candace. All of them had small smiles on their faces, but it was Candace who answered. "You'll just have to find out, won't you?"

* * *

Major Monogram lowered his sunglasses slightly, peering over the rims with narrowed eyes. The Flynn-Fletcher children, their friends, and their relatives had just disappeared behind a huge outcropping of trees, and the man was determined to figure out why.

Couldn't they just use the regular beach, like everyone else?

He strode in that direction, his shoed feet treading heavily in the sand and making it difficult for him to walk confidently, unlike all those who had chosen to go barefoot.

He had almost gotten there when a dark haired lifeguard, who Monogram recognized as Candace's friend Jenny, stopped him.

"Sir, I'm sorry, but you can't go into that alcove. It's been rented out by a private party for the afternoon," she said smoothly.

Monogram slowly narrowed his eyes, staring the girl down. She merely raised an eyebrow and pointed silently behind him. "Sorry, sir, but I'm under strict guidelines not to let you in."

The man scoffed slightly. "Strict by whom? I guarantee there is no one renting that area, and you're just trying to help out a bunch of friends who want a secret spot."

For the briefest second, Francis saw surprise flicker in Jenny's eyes and he smirked, knowing that he could use this against her. "I'm right, aren't I? Listen young lady, if you don't allow me in there, I'll find your superior and have you fired. This is a strict violation-"

"Of agency rules," came a dark, harsh, nasally voice behind him.

Monogram spun around to see Carl there, his arms crossed and his eyes so menacing that even Francis was startled for a moment. "Carl? What…what are you doing here?"

Carl raised an eyebrow and gestured to his outfit; for the first time, Monogram realized that the boy was wearing swim trunks and flip flops. "I came to hang out with my family on my day off. It's a good thing I did. Sir, you're interrogating a minor, not to mention black mailing her into letting you go into that alcove. That's just wrong, and she could have you arrested for it. I mean, you are well into your fifties, sir."

Monogram clenched his teeth and turned stiffly to Jenny, whose eyes were wide. "I'm sorry, young lady. I won't bother you again."

She nodded slowly and Monogram sent a piercing glare at Carl before striding away. Carl watched him go, and then turned to Jenny. "Are you ok, Jenny?" he asked.

Jenny opened her mouth, and then blinked in surprise and stared at him. "Well, yeah…but how do you know my name?"

Carl almost slapped his forehead. "Well…I actually know the Flynn-Fletcher family, and they've mentioned you before. Candace one time showed me your picture, so…"

Jenny visibly relaxed and smiled. "Oh. Ok. Wait…"

She looked him over slowly, and then her eyes drifted to where Monogram had been. She lowered her voice. "You know, don't you? That's why you were trying to keep that guy away from that alcove."

Carl blinked in surprise. Man, she was good! "Well….yes, but I stopped him mostly because he was being incredibly rude to you. As far as I can tell, you're not doing anything wrong. I think if your boss knew the….circumstances under which you let them have the alcove, they'd be fine with it."

Jenny grinned brightly. "Thanks, um…"

"Carl," the boy supplied, tipping an imaginary hat.

Jenny nodded. "Thanks Carl."

Carl smiled, waved to the girl, and headed back towards his family, all the while thinking that he had to talk to Candace.

* * *

**Yeah baby! I love making Carl all menacing like. It's fun. But it could be bad for Carl….dun dun DUN. **

**And yes, you'll see the return of Jordan and Jack. But only briefly. **

**Jenny needed more love. She's hardly in the show anymore. **

**Review please!**


	8. Nobody Reads Chapter Titles

**CHAPTER 8- Not much to say. Reviews: **

**14AmyChan: Carl's the greatest. **

**Krikanalo: I know, right? I actually thought about maybe having Jenny fall for Carl a little bit, but I wasn't sure…**

**Fanatic97: Wait'll you see the end of this chapter (: *evil cackle***

**FanficChic2: No, no he doesn't.**

**Ficklepickle7: I hadn't thought of that…maybe if I can fit it in somewhere.**

**I don't own Phineas and Ferb or Gravity Falls. Jordan and Jack make a quick appearance in this chapter. I LOVE this chapter. Bwahahaha. **

* * *

_Carl smiled, waved to the girl, and headed back towards his family, all the while thinking that he had to talk to Candace. _

* * *

GENERAL POV

* * *

The kids waited quietly at the edge of the lapping water, Dipper and Mabel having long since run out of questions about Jordan and Jack.

"So where is she?" Mabel asked, her eyes scanning the ocean.

Stacy shrugged. "I mean, they do live quite a ways down. It could take a few minutes."

"What could?" Candace asked, popping her head up out of the water several feet out and smiling.

Everyone on land jumped and the waded into the water as two other mer-people surfaced on either side of Candace, both of them smirking and trying not to laugh.

"Yeesh, Candace, a little warning next time," Phineas said with a smile, nodding to the two mer-people at her sides. "Hey Jack, Jordan."

The two grinned and waved at the triangular boy.

Candace glanced at Mabel and Dipper, who were standing uncertainly on shore. She rolled her eyes and waved a hand. "Come on, you two. They aren't going to…bite…" she said, trailing off towards the end as her eyes landed on Dipper.

Candace winced and pulled herself into shore, kneeling on her tail in ankle deep water as Mabel splashed into the waves. "Come on, Dipper. It was a while ago, and you know they're nothing like those ones."

Dipper shivered slightly. "I know, Candace, believe me. I mean, after you left we did meet a merman who was really nice. But he still freaked me out a little. Especially when I had to….gah."

The boy shuddered, more from disgust than fear. Candace smiled gently. "Seriously? Your sister is having a great time. Come on."

Dipper sighed, shrugged, and began wading out into the water, helping Candace for a few feet before she was able to swim back out.

He studied the mer-people closely as he approached.

The girl-Jordan- had shoulder blade length blonde-brown hair and a bright silver and blue swimsuit. From what Dipper could see, her tail was blue and silver as well. She had what looked like a pencil tucked over her ear.

The guy-Jack- had dark brown, or maybe black-Dipper couldn't tell which- hair that looked like it had recently been trimmed. He had a dark red, almost maroon tail, and he had a spear resting in a sheath across his back.

Dipper waded out further and Jordan glanced up with a smile, her bright blue-green eyes sparkling. "Hey. You must be Dipper. Candace has told us a lot about you two."

Dipper and Mabel turned to Candace, who shrugged, a smile on her face. "Aw come on, you guys have got some crazy things going on in Gravity Falls. I can't not tell them about you."

"Hey Jordan?" Mabel said, tugging lightly on the girl's arm. The mermaid looked down at her with a raised eyebrow. "Yeah, Mabel?"

Mabel pondered her words for a moment. "You wouldn't happen to know a merman named Mermando, would you?"

She glanced at Jack. "Or you?"

Jack frowned slightly. "I don't. Jordan?"

Jordan paused for a moment, running her fingers through her hair. Slowly, she smiled. "He wouldn't happen to be Spanish, would he?"

Mabel gasped in delight. "Yes, yes he is!"

Jordan grinned. "Then yeah. He's a cousin on my dad's side. Do you know him?"

Mabel blushed and giggled. Candace took the distraction opportunity and pulled Jack aside quietly.

"Hey, Jack, you know Perry, right?" she asked, keeping her voice low.

Jack nodded. "Yeah, your platypus. The one who fights evil, right?"

Candace smiled thinly. "Yeah. His boss is onto me. Any ideas on what to do?"

Jack frowned for a long moment, rubbing his forehead wearily. Candace could tell that his new position as palace guard was taking a toll on him, but she kept quiet.

"No. Not really. But I would suggest that if he does find out…you might offer your services," the merman said, looking up at her with a small smile.

Candace cocked her head, glancing back over at her group of friends to make sure they were still occupied. "How so?"

Jack shrugged. "You can talk to animals, right? Or at least, aquatic ones. And humans can't. So, you could be quite helpful."

Candace smiled slowly. "That's actually a really good idea. Thanks, Jack!"

Jack nodded, and then glanced down at his waterproof watch. "Darn it. Jordan, we've got to go!" he called.

Jordan sighed. "Drat. Our bosses each only gave us ten minutes for a break," she explained. "Bye Candace, bye Stacy!" she called.

Jack nodded. "See you guys. Tell Jeremy I said hi!" he said as the two waved and disappeared.

Candace smiled. She really enjoyed the fact that the two mer-people she was friends with liked her friends. (The story behind how Stacy and Jordan had met wasn't a good one-it involved a fishing net and a lot of insane fishermen) **A/N: Anyone wants a one-shot about that, I can make it happen!**

Phineas and Ferb helped Candace back onto the beach and Baljeet, who had gone to dry off, leaned down and glanced at Candace's phone. "Candace, you have missed a phone call!" he called out to her.

Candace, who had almost forgotten that Baljeet and Buford were there (they had been surprisingly quiet), jumped a good foot. "Oh. Can you bring my phone here?"

Baljeet trotted down the sand and handed the girl her phone. The others left Candace there, going to dry off, and Candace leaned back to listen to the voicemail as her tail vanished.

"Candace, this is Carl. Listen, Monogram was interrogating Jenny on you guys being back in that alcove. I think he's been following you. I got him away from her, but uh…well, Jenny knows that I know about you now. I don't know if that's a problem but….be careful."

Candace almost groaned out loud at that message, nearly pitching her phone into the ocean. She climbed wearily to her feet and went to her towel, sidestepping around Buford, who was giving Baljeet a sand wedgie (see, now that was the bully/nerd relationship she hadn't been seeing throughout the day).

She flopped backwards and sighed, making Isabella look at her in worry. "Candace, are you ok?" the girl asked, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear.

Candace sat up and shrugged. "I guess. I'm just…really tired lately, is all."

Isabella didn't look convinced, but she didn't argue with the teen either, instead going back to her book.

Dipper noticed this, but he didn't say anything until later on, when they were all biking back to the house. He pulled Candace back and looked over at her. "Candace, you ok?" he asked, keeping one eye on the road and one eye on his relative.

Candace judged the distance between her and the others and lowered her voice so that only Dipper could hear her.

"Perry's boss was at the beach, trying to figure out what we were doing in that alcove."

Dipper chewed on his lip for a moment. Truthfully, he still wasn't quite used to the fact that his pet pig and his relative's pet platypus were secret agents. He had been avoiding the animals as best as possible, and keeping the secret from Mabel was killing him.

"He didn't see anything, did he?" Dipper asked softly, rounding the bend quickly and almost face planting into a stop sign before once again gaining control of his bike.

Candace held back a giggle and shook her head. "Not that I know of. Carl stopped him. But yeesh, this man is really starting to get on my nerves."

Dipper rolled his eyes. "Well, he does think you're hiding something. I'd want to find out what it was too, especially if I thought it was going to jeopardize my agency."

Candace nodded slowly. "I guess."

Dipper shrugged. "Would he actually find out about you knowing if he knew that you were a mermaid?"

Candace looked over at the boy in confusion. "What do you mean?"

Dipper tilted his head and observed Candace carefully. "I mean, does him knowing about you being a mermaid actually mean he'll learn that you know about the OWCA?"

That stumped Candace. She hadn't really thought about it, but now that Dipper pointed it out, it kind of made sense. There wasn't really a good way to link Candace to the OWCA just because she was a mermaid.

"Huh. I'll have to talk to Carl about that," she mused, pulling into the driveway. "Thanks, Dipper."

Dipper grinned. "Glad I could help, Candace."

* * *

Carl paced anxiously in front of the surveillance camera monitors, running his hands nervously through his hair. Carla joined him a moment later, looking nervous as well.

"Carl? Why did Monogram call us here?"

Carl shook his head and looked desperately at his twin. "I don't know. Carla, this is freaking me out a little. Whatever happens, though, he isn't in charge of you. You're Wanda's intern, not his."

Carla was starting to panic. "Why? Carl, what do you think he's going to do?"

Carl pursed his lips and shook his head, pressing his fingertips together. "I don't know. But whatever it is, it can't be good. With the way I've been acting towards him lately…"

Carl sighed and sank into a chair. His twin winced and rested a hand on her brother's shoulder comfortingly. "Hey, it'll be ok," she reassured him.

Carl opened his mouth to respond, but Monogram walked into the room before he could. The man nodded to Carla and stood in front of the two sternly.

"It has come to my attention that you two are hiding something from the agency," he started. "Carla, since you are not my intern, I have no power over you. However, I wanted you to be here for this."

Monogram took a deep breath and began pacing quietly, stroking his mustache. "Because I can't trust you right now, Carl, I have made a…rather tough, though not permanent, decision."

Carl gulped and he felt Carla's hand tighten on his shoulder. "Sir? What are you saying?"

Francis looked down at Carl sadly. "Carl, you're fired from the OWCA until further notice."

* * *

**I just did that. *Evil smile***

**Review!**


	9. Well Maybe One Person But That's It

**CHAPTER 9- Here I am! Sorry I had to fire Carl, guys, but it makes sense later. **

**Gamelover41592: Thanks! It's already mostly written, but I have to post it after I finish this cause it gives away the ending.**

**Fanatic97: That's what I was going for. **

**14AmyChan: Honey, I'm gonna need Carl back for this chapter. **

**Rachealninja10: Ha. I stand corrected.**

**Living Encyclopedia: Yeah….**

**Krikanalo: Does he? Does he really?**

**Guest: Calmin down now. Calmin down.**

**I don't own Phineas and Ferb or Gravity Falls. Sorry for any mistakes, not much time to proof this. **

* * *

_Francis looked down at Carl sadly. "Carl, you're fired from the OWCA until further notice."_

* * *

CARL'S POV

* * *

This…this can't be happening. I've been part of this agency since I was probably a toddler. I can't be…._fired._

Major Monogram shook his head at me sadly. "I'm sorry, Carl, but until I figure out what is going on, or until I feel that I can trust you again, I can't allow you to work here. Carla, be lucky I am not your boss, or the same fate would befall you."

Carla scowled. "Sir, with all due respect, what are you going to do without Carl? You can barely work the copier without him!"

I flinched. _Not helping, Carla. _

Monogram frowned. "Carla, you are dismissed from this area. Go back to work this instant or I will call Wanda."

Carla looked at me sadly, but she had no choice but to leave. I gave her a sympathetic smile as she stepped out the door, and then turned back to Monogram.

"Carl, you can end this right now if you just tell me what you're hiding."

I narrowed my eyes. I had been hiding Candace's secret for nearly two years. I wasn't going to give up on her yet. "Sorry, sir, but it's not my place to say."

Monogram scowled. "Fine. Oh, and Carl, before you leave…"

He smirked slightly, and I sighed, knowing what was coming. "There's a clogged pipe or something in Agent P's lair. Fix it now, and I may reconsider. After that, get your stuff out of here."

He strode out of the room and I was left staring at the wall. I can't believe he had fired me! And now, what, he wanted me to do more work before I left? No sir, I wasn't doing anything! That pipe could explode for all I cared!

I sighed and heaved myself out of the chair I had collapsed in, wishing I could stay there for forever.

Instead I slumped to my cubicle, getting sad smiles from the agents who had already heard about my being fired. None of them stopped or anything, but I couldn't blame them; they did have evil scientists to go fight.

When I reached my desk, I unplugged my laptop, swept up the few pictures I had, and began emptying my drawers into a box.

As I pulled open the second one, something glinted at me, and I blinked, seeing Candace's fedora charm lying at the bottom of the drawer. That's right. I had modified it, but never given it back.

I sighed and pocketed the charm, knowing I'd have to give it back soon. But for now, I was unpaid, unemployed, and untrusted (not that I hadn't been two of those things before).

What a day.

* * *

GENERAL POV, NEXT DAY

* * *

Candace sat in her room the next morning, idly flipping through a magazine while hanging upside down on her bed.

Her bedroom door flew open and she sat up abruptly, ready to yell at whoever had barged in, when she saw Dipper and Pinky. The dog looked distraught and Dipper just looked confused.

"He just came flying into the backyard, barking like crazy. No one could figure out what was wrong. I managed to convince everyone he was ok, and then we came here."

Candace frowned. "Pinky, what's wrong?"

The dog barked frantically and Candace's face fell as her fingers flew to her neck. "Shoot. Carl has my necklace!"

Pinky suddenly barked and put a finger to his nose. Candace cocked her head. "Huh?"

The dog sighed and pulled a paper and pen out of his hat, writing rapidly and thrusting the pages at Candace.

_Carl got FIRED._

Candace felt all color drain from her face as she read that note. "Fired? He got…fired? Oh my gosh, why?"

Pinky groaned quietly, but Perry darted into the room, saving Candace from having to read more of Pinky's sloppy hand writing.

"_Carl got fired!"_

Candace nodded. "Yeah, I know. He also has my necklace. But why'd he get fired?"

Perry sighed and ran a hand through his fur. _"It's going around that Monogram can't trust him."_

Candace gave a small cry and fell backwards, burying her head into her hands. "Great. So this is all my fault!"

Perry and Pinky looked at each other in despair, and Dipper stepped quietly over to Candace. "Candace….I'm not sure what's going on anymore, but maybe you should go talk to Carl. At the very least, get your necklace back."

Candace sighed and sat back up, rubbing her forehead wearily. "You're right, Dipper. You're right. I'll be back, guys. Perry, is it secure in your lair right now?"

Perry quickly did something on his watch, and then nodded, giving her a thumbs up.

Candace slipped into her closet and disappeared to Perry's lair. Dipper sighed and sat on the bed, looking at the two pets in front of him.

"Man, I hope everything turns out ok," he murmured.

The platypus and Chihuahua couldn't agree more.

Candace landed quietly in Perry's lair, glancing around the dark room carefully before standing up and coming out from behind the pole.

She froze at the sight of a figure sitting in Perry's chair, and then relaxed when Carl looked up. Even in the dim lighting, Candace could see that the boy's eyes were red from crying, and Candace winced. She never knew what to do when a guy cried.

The girl walked across the room and knelt quietly next to the intern, putting a hand on his shoulder. "You ok, Carl?"

The boy sighed, rubbing his face wearily. "I don't know, Candace. I…this internship was all I had. My entire family has been with the OWCA since before I was born, and I always felt so sure of myself here. I don't know what to do now."

Candace had never heard the intern so distraught, and it broke her heart. "I'm sorry, Carl. This is all my fault," she murmured, looking at the floor.

Carl looked up sternly, his eyes flashing. "Candace Gertrude Flynn. It is most certainly not your fault. I could have given up your secret at any time but I chose not to. Even when Monogram offered me my job back in exchange for that information, I still kept it. It was my decision, and I'm fully responsible for my actions."

Candace stared at him and then leaned over and hugged him quickly. "Thanks, Carl. That means a lot."

Carl blushed slightly, grateful that the darkness hid his face. Very few girls hugged him, and even though he had no romantic feelings towards Candace in any way, it still felt good.

The two sat awkwardly for a moment before Carl snapped his fingers. "Oh yeah! Hey, I have your necklace."

Candace grinned. "Nice! Did you finish modifying it?"

Carl smiled thinly and nodded, pulling the delicate charm from his pocket. "Yeah. About an hour before I was fired."

Candace grimaced and took the necklace from him gently. "Thanks anyway, Carl. I'm sorry you got fired for this."

The boy shrugged. "It was worth it. Agent P would never forgive me if I gave you up."

Candace raised an eyebrow and looked sideways at him as she clasped on her fedora charm. Carl smiled. "Ok, I'd never forgive myself. I keep my promises."

He snorted, a smirk crossing my face. "Just ask Monty."

Candace looked at him in confusion, not sure what Monogram's son had to do with this. Carl saw her look and waved a hand. "Never mind."

The two sat some more before Candace finally stood up with a sigh. "I don't think I can do anymore damage here. I should go."

Carl winced and stood up as well. "Candace, seriously, don't blame yourself for this."

Candace gave him a smile. "Carl, no matter how many times you say that, I'm still going to feel responsible. Besides, I should really go see what the boys are doing. Phineas mentioned something earlier about the world's largest firecracker."

Carl snickered. "That could end badly."

The red head rolled her eyes. "Tell me about it."

Before either could say anything else, the entire lair shook, making both teens lose their footing. Candace groaned. "See, right there. Probably that firecracker. And now it's probably nothingness."

Carl smiled and helped Candace up off the floor. "Well at least-hang on."

He frowned and looked around at the walls nervously. Candace followed his gaze, unsure what he was looking for until her gut twisted. "Oh. Oh, _crap._"

Carl looked at her nervously. "What? What's wrong?"

Candace started backing towards an entrance. "Carl, how sturdy are the water pipes in here? Because that one there," she said, pointing to a place on the wall, "is about to blow."

Carl's face paled as he recalled what Monogram had told him to do. "Um…we should go."

Candace heeded his advice, but they had taken no more than two steps before the wall exploded and water came rushing into the room at probably forty miles an hour.

Candace was knocked off her feet as the water rose rapidly, as was Carl. Candace came up spluttering (despite being a mermaid, water up the nose was still unpleasant) and in a good nine feet of water, her tail swishing underneath her.

She wiped the water from her face and looked around frantically. "Carl?" she called.

Getting no response, Candace flipped under the water and found the boy, his pants leg stuck on Perry's chair. Candace swam over and yanked the fabric from the plastic before pulling Carl to the surface with her.

"You ok?" she gasped, letting go of the intern's arm as he calmed down.

Carl nodded, his chest heaving and his glasses crooked. He fixed them and took a breath, glancing around the lair in worry. "Candace, it's still rising, and all the entrances are underwater now."

He glanced at her, and despite having known that Candace was a mermaid, he still did a brief double take and Candace had to remind herself that he had only ever seen her as a mermaid on a video screen.

"Sorry," he murmured, rubbing his eyes. Candace nodded and glanced around, noting as she did so that with every passing second they were getting closer to the ceiling.

"Ok," she said slowly. "If we open one of the entrances, we flood the streets. If we stay here…you drown. Um…the only way out then, would be…"

Carl winced. "Through the agency. We'd still flood it, but it's the middle of the day, so there aren't too many agents here right now. Unlike your yard, which is probably filled with kids."

Candace sighed and looked up. The ceiling was nearly within arm's reach.

"Flooding the agency it is."

* * *

**Hee hee hee. I feel evil. This is my fave part of the story. **

**I have a new Randy Cunningham story on the brain right now...hmmm...**

**Review please! And again, sorry for any mistakes I missed.**


	10. I Could Sing a Song Up Here

**CHAPTER 10- Hey, I'm back! I just cleaned my room, ate a cup of soup, watched TV, and now I'm ready to post the next chapter! :D**

**Fanatic97: What on earth?**

**Krikanalo: I have no idea. I think both of them are acceptable, but whatever. I just type what I think. Sometimes I shouldn't (:**

**14AmyChan: Don't worry, they'll be fine…or WILL they? **

**FanficChic2: That's ok. And I mean, it could end well. It probably won't (heeheehee) but it could. **

**Living Encyclopedia: Wow. Nice. (:**

**Guest: That was um…creepy? And yeah, I'm excited too :P**

**I don't own Phineas and Ferb or Gravity Falls. Sorry, this chapter is a bit shorter than most of my usual chapters. I'm saving the whatnot for the next chapter. Haha. **

* * *

"_Flooding the agency it is."_

* * *

GENERAL POV

* * *

Candace pulled her head above water, almost knocking it off the ceiling. Poor Carl looked like he was writing a mental will.

"You ok, Carl?" Candace asked, pulling a strand of hair out of her mouth in disgust.

Carl nodded, pressing his hands against the ceiling as the water continued to rise. "I'll be ten times better once we get out of here."

Candace sighed. "There's a door down there," she said, pointing towards the floor. "I can open it and the water will flood out into the rest of the agency. Since all the agents are on their missions, they should be ok. The only problem is that that water is going to be moving really quickly. You'll need to hold onto something."

Carl nodded, his chin brushing the water. "Ok, just tell me where and I'll do it!"

Candace grabbed the intern's wrist and pulled him over to where the giant monitor was. "Here. It has cables supporting it to the ceiling. You can hold onto those. If you lose your grip, I'll know. Just hold on tightly."

Carl now had his cheek pressed against the ceiling, as did Candace. "Would you go already?"

Candace nodded and dove underwater, almost smacking Carl with her tail. She found the door quickly and grabbed tightly to the doorknob with one hand. With the other, she grasped a metal pole that was attached to the wall as tightly as she could.

She glanced up at Carl in time to see him take a deep breath just before he went under. Also taking a deep breath, though hers was more from nerves, Candace twisted the knob and threw the door open.

Water cascaded into the hallway, almost pulling Candace after it. She yelped and tightened her grip on the bar as the water yanked her tail out the door. She heard a mental scream and her eyes flew open and her hand shot out, her fingers wrapping tightly around Carl's wrist before he could get knocked out the door.

They were under for another thirty seconds or so before the pull subsided, and Candace wasted no time in pulling Carl above water. The boy coughed wildly, adjusting his glasses, which were, incredibly, still on his nose.

"You good?" Candace asked worriedly.

Carl held up a hand and took a deep breath before nodding slowly. "Yeah," he said with a slight cough. "I think I'll be fine."

Candace nodded and glanced around, letting go of Carl's wrist as she did so.

There was still at least eight feet of water in the lair, and the pipe was still gushing in the corner. The only reason the level wasn't rising much was because of the open door. Sadly, because of the water, the entrances were all still underwater. And even if she tried to use one, the chances of her backyard being stranger free were slim.

Candace sighed. "Can we get out of here through the agency?" she asked Carl.

The intern hesitated. "Well, yes….but won't someone see you?"

Candace shrugged. "Not if we're careful. You go first and keep a lookout. If you see anyone…then I'll hide. But the water's not going down anytime soon."

Carl nodded and began paddling forward, Candace following close behind.

They passed through several rooms and hallways. All the rooms were meeting rooms, all empty and pretty much ruined thanks to the water. They came across no one in the area, and the two relaxed a little.

"Well," Carl said slowly as he poked his head around a corner, "at least no agents were hurt or anything."

Candace nodded in agreement. "Yeah. It could've been a lot worse."

Carl rolled his eyes and trudged through another room, his arms brushing aside pens, pencils, and other items as he swam towards the next room. "You can say that ag- holy crap!"

He said the last part in a whisper and backed up quickly, pushing Candace back against the wall. She looked at him in confusion.

"What? What's wrong?" she asked, keeping her voice down.

Carl gulped slowly, his eyes nervously darting between the door and Candace. "Major Monogram is in the next room," he hissed.

* * *

Phineas and Ferb stared blankly at the sky, their eyes wide in disbelief. "Ferb, please explain to me how a giant firecracker blows up and then turns into a bunch of balloons."

Ferb shook his head slowly. "The world is mysterious," was all he could think of to say.

Phineas glanced at his brother with a raised eyebrow and shook his head before turning back to the large crowd that was in the yard.

"Sorry, folks! It exploded a little sooner than planned!"

The large crowd of Danvillians **(?)** grumbled a little but left the yard with little fuss, leaving the typical seven kids in the yard.

Buford crossed his arms in annoyance. "Well now what, pointy?"

Phineas raised an eyebrow at Buford. The bully only called him that when he was irritated. "I don't know. We still have like, half the day left and our big project went up with a bang."

Baljeet chuckled. "Literally."

Phineas grinned. "Even though that wasn't what it was supposed to do, it was still kind of cool."

Isabella kept glancing at the house, her eyebrows crinkled slightly. Phineas frowned. "Is, what's wrong?" he asked the girl.

She sighed. "I'm just worried about Pinky. I mean, I know Dipper said he'd take him inside and calm him down, but…I've never seen him so freaked out before."

Mabel smiled gently at the girl. "It's ok. You should have seen Waddles when he almost got eaten by a pterodactyl."

Isabella stared at the girl in horror. "Your pig almost got eaten?"

Mabel gave a tight nod. "Yeah. But Grunkle Stan saved him, so he's doing pretty well."

Phineas nodded. "I'm sure Pinky's fine, Isabella. He probably just got spooked by something outside."

Isabella sighed and rubbed her left shoulder. "Yeah. You guys are probably right. So, what do we do now?"

Phineas and Ferb looked at each other, then around at the backyard. "Well, first we should probably clean up this mess," Ferb pointed out.

Sure enough, the backyard was covered with the remains of the giant firecracker, debris scattered everywhere, even in the tree and on the roof.

Mabel sighed, pushed up her sweater sleeves, and pulled her hair back. "Well then, let's get to work!"

Dipper watched from Candace's window, keeping back so that nobody would see him if they looked. Perry, Pinky, and Waddles paced behind him, the former two having just gotten back from their missions.

"So, what are agents saying about Carl?" Dipper asked, turning around and raising an eyebrow.

Perry pulled out a notepad and started scribbling down an answer, handing it over a minute later.

_Turns out a lot of agents know about Candace, and they know that that's why Carl got fired. They're mostly mad at Monogram, but a few blame Candace._

Dipper's eyes widened. "They know about Candace? How is that even possible?"

Pinky chuckled, took Perry's notepad from the boy, and jotted down a note.

_She may know about the OWCA, but the agents certainly get around. Plus rumors spread like wildfire when you're the only ones who can understand each other. _

Dipper sighed. "I guess that's true. Does Candace know other agents know?"

The agents shook their heads and Dipper frowned. "But they've been keeping the secret from Monogram?" he questioned, getting nods in response. "Why?"

Perry and Pinky glanced at one another and then back at Dipper. Perry took his notepad and jotted something down.

_We're not sure, really. We think that they don't really care that she knows, so long as she keeps it a secret._

Dipper shook his head. "Wow. Are all agents so laid back?"

The animals snorted in amusement and Dipper grinned, glancing towards Candace's closet. "What's taking her so long with Carl?"

Perry frowned slightly, glancing at his watch. Actually, that was a really good question. Where was Candace? It shouldn't have taken almost an hour to get her necklace back from Carl and to apologize. The platypus shook his head, and Dipper crawled into Candace's closet, finding the secret entrance quickly.

He frowned after a moment, pressing his palms into the floor. "Um, Perry? Any reason the carpet is soaked around the entrance?"

Perry and Pinky looked at each other and scrambled into the closet, Dipper backing out quickly to make room for them. They came back out a moment later, their faces equally confused. Pinky shook his head and Perry shrugged.

Dipper chewed on his lip for a moment, adjusting his hat sub consciously. "Huh. If Candace can move water, why would she just leave spilled water on her floor? It'd ruin the carpet."

His eyebrows furrowed slowly. "Unless…Perry, there weren't any leaky pipes or anything in your lair, were there?"

Perry's eyes widened and his face paled slightly as he exchanged glances with Pinky and Waddles. Dipper saw the look and he grimaced, saying what all of them were thinking.

"Well, this won't end well."

* * *

**Ha-ha. Cliff hangers. Sort of. I suppose. **

**But yeah, I figure only two to four more chapters. I swear my stories just get shorter and shorter….sigh. Oh well. **

**BTW, I have that one-shot about Perry and Stacy telling Candace typed and ready to go, but I can't post it until I finish this story because it gives away the ending. And I'm working on the (possible) two shot where Stacy meets Jordan. **

**Review please! (Give me hope. I entered a writing contest and am having a nervous breakdown)**


	11. Ok So Maybe I Won't Sing

**CHAPTER 11- So I'm back. Again. And stuff actually happens in this chapter! :D**

**Fanatic97: I mean, you don't have to love them. You can if you want to ;)**

**Krikanalo: Thanks for the boost of confidence!**

**Guest: Camin down now. Calmin down. I had to babysit when it aired….grumble.**

**Living Encyclopedia: I don't either. And aw, thank you so much! I feel much better now!**

**14AmyChan: No, no they don't (: And wow. People read the titles. **

**FanficChic2: Probably like three more chapters or so. Not positive, but that's the amount I'm planning for right now. **

**Guest: Thanks so much, and here you go!**

**I don't own Phineas and Ferb or Gravity Falls (even though none of those characters appear in this chapter.)**

* * *

"_Well, this won't end well."_

* * *

GENERAL POV

* * *

Candace looked at Carl in horror. "What do you mean, Monogram's in the next room?" she hissed.

Carl gave her a look. "What else could I mean, Candace?" he growled softly.

Candace backed up down the hall a little, sinking in the water and rubbing her shoulders nervously. Carl sighed and paddled over to her.

"Ok, look, the water's still a good eight or nine feet deep. I'll swim in and distract him, and you swim as close to the floor as you can get. Hopefully he won't see you," Carl said gently, glancing back at the door with worry.

Candace hesitated and then nodded, not able to come up with another plan. "Ok. I'll give you thirty seconds."

Carl smiled and kicked his way into the meeting room, startling Monogram. "Sir, are you ok?" Carl asked warily, moving around the floating table and chairs to get to the man, who seemed to be stuck.

Francis frowned slightly. "I've been better. My foot's caught under this bookcase, and I think it's sprained. I can't get it out."

Carl grimaced and swam over to float next to the Major. Sure enough, a large metal bookcase had been knocked over in the flooding and Monogram's foot was now caught between the wall and the shelving unit.

"What were you doing in here?" Carl asked as he maneuvered around the man so that his back was to the wall and Monogram had to face him, thus taking his eyes off the door.

Monogram rolled his eyes. "Setting up for a meeting. All of a sudden the water just flew in here. It's a good thing it wasn't too deep."

Carl nodded and braced his shoulder against the bookcase, trying his best to ignore the shape of Candace swimming around the table and towards the door.

Francis raised an eyebrow. "This wouldn't have happened because of that clogged pipe, would it?" he questioned.

Carl sighed and heaved against the bookcase as best he could. It barely budged. "Yeah. I went to fix it, but I was a bit too late. It exploded and Agent P's lair was totally underwater. It's a good thing I opened the door," he said slowly, knowing Monogram needed some explanation.

Monogram shrugged and pushed himself forward with his arms, grabbing hold of the side of the bookcase. "You push, I'll pull."

Carl nodded.

"Ok," Monogram said. "On the count of three. One…two…three!"

The intern shoved the metal as hard as he could, straining his shoulder a bit. Monogram pulled with all of his might, despite having very little to push off of. The bookcase moved forward slightly and that's when Carl noticed the slight movement of the water, the way it was pushed up against the shelves.

His eyes rose quickly and he spotted Candace, hidden just around the corner, her eyes narrowed in concentration.

The intern gritted his teeth and continued pushing, knowing that Candace couldn't give that much help or she'd risk being discovered.

Finally, the bookcase gave and sank to the floor on its side, sending a large stream of bubbles up to the surface. Monogram moved quickly out of the way, grimacing in pain.

Carl swam next to the Major and sat him down on the top of the table that was in the room. "Stay here sir, and I'll go get help," he told the man.

The boy swam for the door and Monogram looked at him curiously. "Carl, I fired you. Why are you being so nice to me?"

Carl hesitated, kicking his legs gently in thought. "Because, sir, I may be upset with you, but I don't want you to get hurt. I do work for good, after all."

The boy smiled thinly and swam out of the room, leaving the man to think.

* * *

Carl caught up with Candace at the next corner, ready to yell at her for putting herself at such risk. All ideas of that, however, went out the door when he saw what she was looking at.

At the end of the hall was a tall staircase that went up to the next level of the agency. At the moment, the water only covered half of the staircase. At the top of the stairs were offices that belonged to the nocturnal agents, so they were most likely empty at the moment.

Carl smiled. "Well, there's our way out."

Candace frowned. "Maybe. Carl, I can't get back to normal unless I'm completely out of the water. I doubt I can get all the way up the stairs using just my hands."

Carl chewed on his lip in thought. "What about your water powers?" he asked.

Candace sighed. "They could move me up to the dry area, but when I move myself I get so drained that I can barely walk. So unless you really want to carry me home…plus, the water is still rising. The pipe never did get fixed."

Carl rolled his eyes. "That's right. Crud. Ok, let's give this a shot."

Candace swam over to the stairs and moved up them as far as she could. But her tail was still about half in the water, and her wet hands kept slipping from underneath her when she pushed on the steps, making it impossible to move.

"Ugh. Carl, a little help?" she pleaded.

Carl moved behind her and grabbed Candace carefully under the arms. He took one step up, pulling her with him. He smiled thinly and did it a few more times. On the fourth step, Candace was almost fully out of the water and on dry land.

And of course, that was when Carl's feet slipped out from under him.

He yelped and fell hard on the marble stairs, losing both his footing and his grip on Candace. His head smacked off of the steps and Candace whipped her head around at the horrible thwacking sound that resonated throughout the hallway. "Carl, are you ok?"

The intern grimaced and raised his fingers to his scalp, pulling them away a moment later to reveal blood. "Aw, shit," he muttered.

Candace stared at the boy in surprise and he waved a hand. "Sorry. Gah, come on, let's try that again."

The mermaid could only look at him in disbelief. "You want to try that again?"

Carl sighed, feeling a bit dizzy. "Do we have another choice, Candace?"

Sighing, the girl concluded that he was right. "All right, but you're getting help from me this time."

Carl nodded and resumed pulling Candace up the steps. She carefully used small amounts of water to get her up the stairs.

The tips of her fins were still in the water when Carl sank to the ground and put his head between his knees. "Ok, way too dizzy to keep going," he mumbled to the floor.

Candace sighed and looked down at the water, which was still rising slowly. Even as she watched, the level started creeping up her tail.

"Carl, come here," the girl said softly.

Carl winced and slowly moved to sit next to Candace. "Put your head down," she instructed him, turning so that she faced the intern.

He did so and Candace reached over, moving his hair so that she could find that cut. She grimaced at the sight of the blood, but placed her hand over it, pressing down firmly. Carl yelped slightly at the sudden pressure and Candace smiled thinly. "Chill, man."

When she pulled her hand away a minute later, the cut was completely gone. The blood was still there, but Candace waved her hand and washed it off quickly.

Carl blinked in surprise and felt his head. "Nice. Thanks, Candace."

Candace smiled. "Feel better?"

Carl nodded and cleaned his glasses off as best he could. "Yeah. I do. But the water's still rising," he pointed out. Sure enough, it had risen to the tops of Candace's fins and was now going up her actual tail.

Candace sighed. "Yeah, I know. We need to get out of here and then figure out a way to get rid of the water in the agency."

Carl rolled his eyes and stood up carefully. "Boy, isn't that the truth."

Candace smiled thinly and allowed Carl to gently grab her biceps. He squinted one eye shut, put his foot carefully on the step behind him, and yanked Candace up off the step and out of water.

And that was when Major Monogram swam into the hallway.

The area went dead silent as Monogram stared at the astonishing sight in front of him.

Candace, still a mermaid and practically dangling from Carl's grip, mouthed "Oh crap," and looked up at Carl in horror.

The intern opened and closed his mouth quickly, unsure of what to say as the Major stared at them.

"Sir," he finally said, "I can explain, I swear."

Monogram raised a shaky hand, his pointer finger raised as if to say something, his face deadly white.

And then Monogram promptly passed out face down into the water.

* * *

**Dun, dun, dun. What now?**

**I know that this chapter was short, but you know…whatever. **

**Review please!**


	12. I Should Go Back to Regular Titles

**CHAPTER 12- Wow. I'm getting this up quickly. Can you guys believe that it's almost been a year since I first uploaded "The Secret Life of Candace?" I cannot believe how popular this series has become! I even started thinking about *cough cough* a deleted scenes story. **

**Fantic97: I don't think it'll be that easy…**

**Guest: Aw, I'm glad I got you in a good mood! Darn teachers, always giving detention for something dumb like a stupid locker. **

**Balordin: I like ice cream! And thanks so much! I love when new people find my stories and enjoy them just as much as those who have been following since the beginning!**

**14AmyChan: Ha-ha. I'm surprised you didn't suggest it. BTW, congrats on your appearance in Take Two with Fanfiction! :D**

**I don't own Phineas and Ferb or Gravity Falls. Man. It's been a long time since I did a plain old Phineas and Ferb story on my own. **

* * *

_And then Monogram promptly passed out face down into the water. _

* * *

GENERAL POV

* * *

Candace yelped, wrenched herself from Carl's grip, and dove straight into the water, luckily missing all of the steps.

She swam quickly over to Monogram, slung one of his arms around her shoulders, and pulled the man to the surface, where Carl was waiting.

The intern slung Monogram's other arm around his shoulders and helped Candace drag him over to the steps.

With the two of them working together, they managed to get Monogram almost to the top of the steps. But he was a lot heavier than Candace, even though she had the extra weight of a tail to deal with.

Candace frowned, raised her hand, and slid a thin sheet of water underneath the man. She lifted it quickly, her arms straining with the effort, and a moment later Monogram was on the second floor landing.

Candace sighed in relief and slumped heavily against the steps, noting that the water was about eight steps from the top.

Carl glanced down at the girl and winced. "Can you get up?" he asked softly, starting down the stairs.

Candace waved a hand. "No. Go wave Major Obnoxious awake. I'll just…pull myself up with the railing. Or something."

Carl hesitated, but did as Candace asked and began trying to wake up Monogram.

Candace slid herself over to the railing and reached up, grasping the cold metal firmly. Using all her upper arm strength, which had greatly increased in the last year because of her tail, she pulled herself up a step. Candace smiled thinly and continued, realizing with slight annoyance that the water kept rising.

Just as she pulled her tail from the water, Major Monogram groaned and sat up slowly, clutching his head in his hands. "Oh…what happened?"

Carl, ignoring the man, stood and moved over to Candace, taking her left arm and helping pull her up the last few steps.

Monogram just stared at Candace as Carl lowered her to the floor, his jaw slack with disbelief. "So…so I wasn't dreaming?" he finally asked.

Candace and Carl glanced up. "No," they both said at the same time.

Candace's tail vanished and Carl held out a hand, pulling the girl to her feet. Monogram just stared, unable to speak.

"Come on," Candace said. "We've got to get out of here and figure out how to fix the pipe. The water's still rising."

Monogram scowled. "Not a chance."

Carl rolled his eyes. "Sir, we don't have time for this. Come on, we'll explain later."

The Major sighed, his face growing weary. "No. My ankle. Remember? It's sprained from the bookcase."

Carl slapped his forehead. "That's right! Candace, can you-?"

Candace shrugged. "I'll give it a shot."

Without asking, Candace dropped to her knees next to Monogram's leg and yanked off his shoe. The man yelped in surprise and pain and Candace smiled thinly, pressing her hands to the man's ankle.

Monogram clenched his teeth and hissed in pain. "What on earth are you-?"

He trailed off slowly, his eyes widening in amazement. Candace pulled her hands off and tossed the man his shoe, realizing with astonishment that the water was beginning to pool around her knees.

Candace leapt to her feet and backed away quickly. "Come on, we've got to get out of here."

Monogram placed his hand onto the railing and pulled himself to his feet, testing his ankle with surprise.

Carl rolled his eyes and pulled the man forward. "Come on, sir, let's go already!"

Monogram followed without any more argument, Carl leading the way through the agency. The trio ran up another short flight of stairs and rounded the corner before they stopped again.

"All right," the Major said, his eyes narrowing, "you two have a lot of explaining to do."

Carl sighed. "Fine, sir. But not here."

He pushed open a door into a meeting room and gestured Monogram and Candace inside, shutting the wood after the two had sat down, Monogram at the head of the table.

Candace stared quietly at her hands, which were clasped in her lap. Carl sat down next to the girl and looked over at Francis warily.

Monogram sighed, rubbing his temples with his fingertips. "Normally, Candace, if I found out that you knew about the agency, I'd either erase your memory or relocate Agent P immediately."

Carl raised an eyebrow. "Sir, you realize that you just assumed she knew about the agency, right?"

Monogram glared at the intern. "Carl. She was down in some of the deepest parts of the headquarters. I doubt she wandered down there by mistake."

Candace smiled gently at Carl. "Carl, its fine. Go on, Major," she whispered.

Francis nodded and continued. "However, you seem to have…an interesting story. I want you to tell me what happened, now."

Candace and Carl glanced at one another and then, knowing there was no way out of it, Candace sighed and started the story.

How, almost a year and a half ago, Doofenshmirtz accidentally hit her with the Mermaid-inator. How Perry had saved her at Badbeard Lake, and how she had discovered he was an agent. How he had kept her secret while she kept his. How Pinky had been let in on everything. Telling Ferb, Stacy, and hiding the secret from everyone else for as long as she could.

She told about the day they had gone to the Second Dimension, and how Carl had known and kept her secret because it was her secret to tell. She told, shakily, about her kidnapping, about telling her parents, about the evil mermaids in Gravity Falls and the mermaids nearby that had so helpfully aided her.

She left out a few things: her necklace, and how it allowed her to talk to other animals (she knew Monogram would take it if he knew about it, so he just thought that she could understand all animals instead of just aquatic and semi-aquatic ones), and Dipper and how he had figured out about the agents four days earlier.

When Candace finally finished her story, with Carl's help (he had jumped in whenever she left something out he thought was important), Monogram just stared at them in disbelief.

"So you're telling me that you," he said, pointing to Candace, "are a mermaid because of one of our evil scientists, and that you," he stated, motioning to Carl, "didn't bother to tell me about probably the biggest security breech EVER?"

Carl flinched. "Sir, um, just to tell you…just about every agent in yours and Wanda's division knows about Candace."

Candace and Monogram whipped their heads around to stare at the intern. "What?" they both yelped.

Monogram looked at Candace suspiciously. "You didn't know about this?"

Candace shook her head rapidly. "No," she stammered, looking at Carl in surprise. "What do you mean, they all know about me?"

Carl chuckled quietly. "Candace, a lot of our agents are aquatic. They've seen you around. And rumors spread quickly. Once other agents heard about you, they started keeping an eye out, catching sight of you on the way to missions or on the way back. I wouldn't even know about this if the rumor hadn't swung back around to Agent Derek," he said, referring to the dog who had aided Perry and Pinky in getting Phineas, Ferb, and their friends away from the Pollution-izer that had been created by Rodney and destroyed (mostly) by Candace.

Candace sank back in her seat in shock, her eyes wide. Monogram shook his head.

"Hold on a second. So you're saying that every agent in my agency knew about this security breech and didn't tell me?"

Carl smirked. "That's exactly what I'm saying, Major."

Monogram scowled. "Even so, Candace, I'm sorry. But you've known about the agency for too long for me to erase your memory without permanent damage. I'm afraid we'll have to relocate Agents Pinky and Perry."

Candace shot up in her seat, her eyes wide. "No, please Major Monogram! My brothers and Isabella would be devastated!"

She sank backwards quietly, tears pooling in her eyes. "I'd be devastated," she whispered.

Monogram sighed and shook his head. "I'm sorry, Candace, but this is a huge violation of agency policy."

Candace searched her brain for something that could help her, recalling suddenly the advice that Jack had given her the other day. "Wait, sir. What if…what if you let me join the agency?" she asked quickly.

Monogram slowly frowned. "How so?"

Candace smiled. "Well, I mean, I am a mermaid. I could take underwater missions when your other aquatic agents need help or can't do something. And…with my healing abilities, you wouldn't have to worry about agents getting hurt as much. And since I can understand the animals, there won't be any confusion as to communication."

She sat there, a pleading look in her eyes while she waited for Monogram to respond.

The Major sat for a good five minutes, staring at the girl.

As much as he hated to admit it, she was right. She _could _be beneficial to the agency. She did have unique abilities that other animals and people couldn't claim to have. But still…

"I'd like to say yes, Candace, I really would," Monogram said.

"But?" Candace said softly, knowing it was coming.

Monogram sighed. "But, there's the question of, can I trust you? Or Carl, for that matter. You did hide this from me for over a year. How do I know you won't hide something like this from me again?"

Candace and Carl looked at one another. "Because, sir," Carl said, "now that you know about Candace, we won't have anything to hide from you. We hid everything before because you didn't know her secret."

Monogram thought this over briefly, and then nodded slowly. "All right. All right, you can be an…honorary agent of the agency. I'll only call you in when we need you, so you don't have to come in daily, and you can keep Perry and Isabella can keep Pinky."

Candace jumped from her seat and darted over to the man in excitement. "Thank you so much, sir!" she yelped with glee.

Monogram held a hand up. "But!" he said firmly.

Candace quieted down immediately, her smile disappearing.

"But," Monogram said again, "if you tell anyone else about the agency, or I find out that you are working against the agency, or you don't have a good excuse for coming in-busting is NOT a good excuse-then I will have to fire you and relocate Perry and Pinky."

Candace nodded firmly. "I understand completely, sir."

The Major smiled thinly and opened his mouth to say something else, but he was interrupted when the door burst open and in rushed Perry, Pinky, Waddles, and Dipper.

* * *

***slaps forehead* ****Those doofuses. They're going to ruin everything! Or are they? No, IDK. **

**But hey look! A normal length chapter!**

**Can someone recommend a good book? I need something to read….**

**Review please! The box is just so empty :'(**


	13. Starting Next Chapter

**CHAPTER 13- Ok, wow. There was a serious explosion of reviews. Not that I'm complaining (:**

**14AmyChan: Isn't that how it always goes?**

**Rachealninja10: Kind of inevitable at this point…**

**Weirdgirl332: Thank you so much! That means a lot! And I like writing just for the writing (but money is always a pleasant bonus, even though I get none). I don't plan on stopping anytime soon. (:**

**Living Encyclopedia: As much fun as that would be, it's not happening. No more sequels! But I do have two little one-shots to post to this, and I actually started thinking about a deleted scenes story. Someone stop me!**

**Toystorylover: I'll take a look! And that's the problem. I've read all the books I have lol**

**GravityfallsMD: Is that a book recommendation I hear?**

**BlueWater626: Thank you so much! Compliments like that make my day so much better!**

**Dani Phantom Fenton: Read them all, and yes, yes they are. (:**

**Balordin: I'll give it a shot, thanks!**

**Ok. Phew. That took a while. And like, a page on Word. I don't own Phineas and Ferb. **

* * *

_The Major smiled thinly and opened his mouth to say something, but was interrupted when the door burst open and in rushed Perry, Pinky, Waddles, and Dipper._

* * *

GENERAL POV

* * *

Candace felt her face pale as the group ran into the room, and Monogram slowly narrowed his eyes. "Please explain what is going on," he said darkly.

The agents all glanced at one another, and then Perry chattered softly. _"We figured out that something must have happened down here, and we came down to see what was going on."_

Pinky barked gently. _"Agent R told us you guys were in here," _he said, referring to Ralph the Raccoon, a sometimes but not always nocturnal agent.

Candace sighed and glanced at Monogram. "They figured out that something was going on down here," she told him.

Perry and Pinky looked at one another in surprise, and then looked over at Candace. _"Does…does he know?" _Perry whispered.

Candace nodded slowly. "Yeah."

Monogram laced his fingers together, looking at Dipper with a slightly annoyed expression. "And what, exactly Candace, is your cousin doing here?" he questioned.

Candace looked at Dipper in exasperation. "Yeah, what are you doing here?" she demanded.

Waddles oinked, putting a hoof to the boy's shoulder. _"He needed to talk to Monogram, so we let him come."_

Dipper sighed. "Sir, I do know about the agency," he admitted, "but it was totally my fault. Besides, I've come to ask you if you can erase my memory of it."

Candace looked over at him in surprise, as did Monogram. "What?" the man said, flabbergasted.

Dipper gave Candace a gentle smile. "Sir, I don't want to hide this from my sister. I know how much she loves Waddles, and knowing a secret about him that my sister can't know…I can't do it. Is it possible to just take away my memories of Waddles?"

The pig looked up at Dipper with a grin and Carl nodded before Monogram could answer. "Yeah, it is Dipper."

Francis glanced at Carl in surprise. "Wait…it is? I didn't know that."

Carl smirked slightly but said nothing. Perry and Pinky, now very confused, looked at Monogram.

"_So what's happened here, exactly?" _Perry questioned.

Candace smiled. "Monogram agreed to let us keep you guys, so long as I agree to help out at the OWCA whenever I'm needed."

Perry and Pinky grinned brightly. _"That's good," _Pinky barked, _"because we were going to quit if he tried to relocate us."_

Candace gave them a smile, not willing to translate that part to Monogram.

The Major sighed. "But now we have the problem of the entire agency being underwater to deal with."

Carl glanced out the door and winced. "Uh, sir…it's coming down the hallway."

Monogram nearly banged his head on the table. "Ugh. Of course it is. All right, I'll call the plumber and-"

"Actually, sir," Carl interrupted, putting a hand on Candace's shoulder, "maybe you should let Candace handle this."

Candace grinned at the intern and looked at Monogram pleadingly. Francis studied her for a moment before smiling gently and nodding. "All right. Give it a shot."

Candace turned quickly and looked at Carl. "Carl, you can still shut off the water, right? That area hasn't been flooded?"

Carl frowned. "Actually, it has. We passed it on the way up here. I didn't even think to turn it off at the time."

Candace shrugged. "Ok, no big deal. Just tell me what room to go to and how to shut it off."

The group trooped through the area until the water was lapping at their heels. Candace glanced down briefly, knowing she could only go about thigh deep before she'd lose her legs, and then she looked at Carl. "Ok, so down the hall, to the right, down that first staircase, and the third door on the left?"

Carl nodded and handed her a pair of pliers. "I don't know if you'll need these, but you might. Good luck, Candace."

Perry glanced up at her with a raised eyebrow. _"Want some help, Candace?"_

Candace knelt next to her pet and lowered her voice. "That's sweet of you, Perry, but I need to do this on my own so that Monogram knows that he can count on me."

Perry smiled and saluted the girl. Candace stood, saluted him back and started wading further into the water.

At about knee level, Candace glanced down, spotted the smaller staircase they had gone up earlier, and dove down to the floor below.

As she vanished down the hall, Monogram turned to Carl a bit sheepishly. The man rubbed his neck slowly. "Listen, Carl. I've been thinking…you were only keeping her secret because it wasn't your place to tell. Now that I know how huge that secret is…I'm sorry. Would you like to come back to work at the OWCA?"

Carl smiled brightly. "Of course! I wouldn't think of being an intern anywhere else!"

Monogram crossed his arms a bit gruffly. "You're still not being paid."

Carl rolled his eyes. "Of course not sir."

* * *

Candace almost missed the door, being that it was so dark in the hallways. She found it, though, and swam in through the door carefully, making sure there were no floating items anywhere.

The water level in the room was about three or four feet from the ceiling and still rising. Candace looked around carefully, looking for the shut off valve that Carl had described. She found it quite easily (it was labeled) and swam over to it, gripping onto a pipe to keep herself from floating away.

She had the wrench tucked under her arm, but the knob turned easily in her fingers, and Candace rapidly spun it until it stuck.

The orange haired mermaid pulled herself out of the room and swam back to Perry's lair quickly, just to make sure it had actually stopped flooding. She pulled her head above water and smiled; the pipe was no longer spewing water. It was barely dripping.

Candace sighed slightly, ducked back under the water, and swam back to the hallway where she had left everyone.

The group had been joined by Carla, and as soon as Candace surfaced, she and Carl waded into the water and helped pull Candace out.

She stood up after a few moments and looked over at Monogram. "So, I shut off the water…we're going to need a really long tube and a creek."

The man looked very bewildered, but he nodded slowly and walked back into the meeting room to use a phone that wasn't completely soaked through.

That reminded Candace…

She glanced over at Carl. The boy was still very wet, so Candace squinted one eye shut and waved a hand. The water basically poured off of Carl, leaving his clothes bone dry and his hair so dry that it started frizzing. The intern jumped in surprise, but smiled gratefully at Candace.

The girl did the same to Carla, though she wasn't all that wet, and then did it again when Monogram came out of the office, scaring him half to death.

"All right," said the Major, as soon as his heart started up again, "I called the weapons department, and they're going to bring over some tubing in a few minutes. Luckily, there's a creek out back."

"That's convenient," Carla commented.

"Tell me about it," Candace muttered.

Monogram turned sternly to Dipper. "Once we get this water problem all sorted out, young man, you're getting your memory erased."

Dipper smiled thinly and nodded. "I know, sir. I did ask you to do it."

Monogram's eyes softened just a bit. "Well, yes. And I must admit, that was very mature of you."

He clapped a gentle hand on Dipper's shoulder. "Well done, Dipper."

The man strode off down the hall and Carl and Carla stared open mouthed at Dipper. The boy looked at them in confusion, fixing his hat. "What?"

"He just complimented you," Carl choked out.

Carla shook her head, a grin on her face. "He never does that. You did good, kid."

She chucked Dipper under the chin and nodded to Candace. "I got to go. Good luck with everything, guys."

Candace smiled to her and the group waved as Carla trotted down the hall after Monogram. As she left, Candace slumped to the floor in relief. Dipper and Carl looked over at her in concern. "You all right there, Candace?" Carl asked, pushing his glasses up his nose.

Candace thumped her head back against the wall, a smile creeping up her face. "I am so glad that you guys don't have to sneak around anymore. You have no idea how happy I am."

Carl shrugged and leaned back against the opposite wall. "You know you still can't tell Monogram about your necklace. So that you'll have to hide from him."

Candace glanced over at him, absentmindedly stroking Pinky's back. "Yeah, but so long as I don't take it off or lose it, I'm fine."

Carl rolled his eyes and glanced down the hall. "I'm going to go see what's taking Monogram so long."

Candace jumped to her feet and walked over to the boy quickly. "Hey, Carl, I'm glad you got your job back. If Monogram had let me into the agency and hadn't offered to give you back your internship…I would have really felt guilty then."

Carl smiled lightly. "Candace, like I said, don't worry about it."

He started down the hallway, hesitated, and glanced back. "But thanks. I'm glad you care."

He vanished around the corner and Candace turned to Dipper, Perry, Pinky, and Waddles. "So," she said, putting her hands on her hips. "What do we do until they get back?"

Dipper shrugged. "I don't know, but you better get it done and over with quickly. The water thing, I mean. Phineas and Ferb were wondering where you were, and where I was going."

Candace raised an eyebrow. "What did you tell them?"

Dipper chewed on his lip for a moment. "I told Ferb that I needed to go for a walk by myself. He uh…he understood that."

Candace cocked her head curiously, but didn't pry. "Ok. I guess it worked then."

Dipper nodded, a small smile on his face. Carl came trotting back around the corner, backwards, and Candace saw why a moment later.

Several agents carrying a large piece of tubing between them rounded the corner, watching their paws and hooves carefully so as not to trip over them.

Carl smirked. "How's this for tubing, Candace?"

* * *

**I had no idea how to end this chapter. Like, seriously. No clue. **

**I start school on Monday, and tomorrow I'm going to a wedding, so I don't know when I'll next update. It won't be too long, though. **

**The next chapter will be kind of a wrap up of everything, and then the epilogue, where Mabel and Dipper leave *sad face***

**BTW, have the Candace/Stacy/Perry one-shot ready. If you want me to put it up, better let me know with that there review box.**

**:D**


	14. Darn It's Too Late

**CHAPTER 14- Hey guys! The one-shot is posted, if you hadn't figured that out already and reviewed it like you wonderful people should do! Speaking of reviews….**

**Guest: Ha. That's exactly what I was thinking when I typed it. **

**AJustice90: I can't wait for you to do it!**

**Nehamee: One-shot it up, and thank you!**

**FanficChic2: No, no sequel. If I don't stop writing about Candace as a mermaid, I might rip my hair out. Or someone else's.**

**Weirdgirl332: Thanks so much! I love long reviews, because it means you had a lot to say about my stories! And I wish I could sleep in on Sundays….I like church too much (:**

**Notarealmember: No, no more sequels. But I have one more one-shot (or two shot, depending) on how Stacy met Jordan and Jack. **

**Thanks for all the reviews guys! I don't own Phineas and Ferb or Gravity Falls. **

* * *

_Carl smirked. "How's this for tubing, Candace?"_

* * *

GENERAL POV

* * *

It didn't take long to run the tube out to the creek in the back, or for Candace to easily move the water out through it, more easily and much cheaper than any plumber.

In fact, it took such a short amount of time that Carl had the memory eraser set up again in a good twenty minutes, once Candace reluctantly got all the water out of it.

Monogram, who had been watching all of this in astonishment, turned to Dipper with a half raised unibrow. "Ready, Dipper?"

Dipper hesitated, glancing over at Candace, and then down at Waddles. "Uh, sir…I'd like to have a word with Waddles, if you wouldn't mind."

Candace wasn't sure who looked more surprised, Monogram or Waddles. But the man nodded slowly. "All right. Come on, Carl, Pinky, Perry, and Candace."

The four glanced at one another and followed Francis out of the room quickly, Candace shutting the door behind them.

Dipper knelt and had almost started talking when Carl darted in. "Wait! Sorry, here Dipper."

The intern tossed something at Dipper and ran from the room almost as quickly as he had entered it.

Dipper, through some crazy, miraculous act, dove and managed to catch the glinting object, recognizing it as soon as he opened his fingers to examine the item.

He grinned slowly, glancing at the door as he fastened Candace's necklace around his neck. Waddles smirked, crossing his hooves over one another.

"_So talk, Dipper."_

The boy jumped at the sudden Southern voice and looked at Waddles sharply. "Yeesh, don't freak me out like that. This might take some getting used to."

Waddles cocked an eyebrow Dipper didn't even know he'd had. _"You've met mermaids, gnomes, and the eighth and a half president, and _this _is going to take getting used to?"_

Dipper smiled thinly. "I guess you have a point."

Waddles grinned and then tilted his head, his eyes softening. _"What did you want me for?"_

The tween bit his lip and fiddled with his hat gently, pulling it off his head and twisting it in his hands. "I…thanks, Waddles."

The pig looked genuinely surprised. _"What for?"_

Dipper shrugged. "I mean, I've had a while to think about this. I realized that you do keep us safe, at least in your own way. And Mabel seriously adores you. Like, she'd be heartbroken if someone ever hurt you."

Waddles smiled gently. _"And you wouldn't?"_

Dipper blinked, his face paling. "What? No, that's not what I meant! I'd feel awful if you got hurt too. I'm also sorry that I said you didn't care about Mabel. I know you do."

The pig rested a light hoof on Dipper's shoulder. _"Dipper, I care about both of you. I mean, I wouldn't have attacked Robbie if you hadn't been so upset. Plus, he's a jerk."_

Dipper looked up with a grin. "I knew I liked you."

Waddles chuckled and the two shared a quick and awkward hug. Dipper reached to take the necklace off, but Waddles stopped him.

"_Just for the record, Dipper, I'm proud of you for being mature enough to do this," _the pig oinked, his hoof raised to his forehead in a salute.

* * *

Candace stepped carefully out of the mind erasing room, Dipper fast asleep in her arms. Carl assured her that he would stay like that for at least thirty minutes, so that there was no risk of him waking up in the agency.

Monogram stood at the doorway, his arms crossed. Candace hesitated. "I'd salute you, sir, but I kind of have a handful."

Candace could have sworn she saw his mouth twitch up in a smile, but she was probably imagining it. His eyes twinkled lightly as he nodded to Candace. "That's all right, Candace. I'll uh…I'll call you if I need you."

Candace nodded with relief, afraid that Monogram had been about to change his mind about Candace working for the agency.

"Good night, sir," Candace said with a nod, stepping around him lightly, Perry, Pinky, and Waddles on her heels.

Monogram watched her leave through the back exit, nodding her head to the agents that were cleaning up the damage from the water.

Carl stepped up next to him nervously, looking over at the man with anxiety.

"Any other secrets you need to tell me, Carl?" Monogram said without looking over at the intern.

Carl paused, briefly thinking of Monty's relationship with Vanessa, before shaking his head. "No sir, none that I can think of."

Monogram nodded curtly. "Good. Good night, Carl."

He strode off towards the door and Carl smiled thinly. "Good night, sir," he said to nobody.

* * *

Phineas, Ferb, and Mabel looked up from underneath the tree as Candace backed into the backyard, Dipper still in her arms and Perry and Waddles at her heels. Pinky had gone home, and Candace assumed from the empty backyard that Isabella, Buford, and Baljeet had done the same.

Mabel jumped to her feet in surprise at the sight of her sleeping brother. "What happened?" she asked, running over to Candace and peering at her brother in concern, brushing a strand of dark brown hair behind her ear so that she could see better.

Candace smiled. "I ran into him on the way home from hanging out at the mall. We went to the park and hung out for a while, and then he fell asleep. He's really tired."

Ferb shot a suspicious glance at his sister but said nothing.

The group trooped inside and Candace carefully climbed the stairs and put Dipper in his cot. She backed out of the room, shut off the lights, and turned around, almost running into Ferb.

"Ferb! Yeesh, don't do that!" the girl yelped, putting a hand to her pounding heart.

Ferb smiled sheepishly and looked at his sister curiously. "You weren't at the mall, were you Candace." It wasn't a question, it was a statement.

Candace blinked in surprise and looked down at her smarter-than-the-average brother. "What makes you say that?"

Ferb crossed his arms. "Because, Jeremy, Stacy, Coltrane, and Jenny stopped by to see where you were because you didn't go to the mall."

Candace winced. "Listen, Ferb, I-"

Ferb held up a hand, a small smile on his face. "Whatever it is, Candace, it's your secret. Just be glad Phineas wasn't in the yard. He was mad enough when you didn't tell him you were a mermaid. If he found out you were hiding anything else…"

Ferb trailed off and shrugged, not needing to finish the sentence. Candace grinned and ruffled his hair. "You rock Ferb, you know that?"

Ferb chuckled lightly. "Yes, yes I do."

* * *

Dipper woke up groggily, rubbing his head slowly and glancing around. Phineas and Ferb's room. How had he gotten here?

The door creaked open, the light from the hall creating a strip down the carpet as Mabel poked her head in. She smiled when she saw her brother awake.

"Hey sleepy head," she said with a giggle, stepping into the room and flicking on a desk lamp, flooding the room with soft light.

Dipper yawned and sat up carefully, cracking his back. "What…how did I get here?"

Mabel shrugged. "Candace brought you in, silly. You fell asleep at the park."

Dipper frowned and furrowed his eyebrows. "Park? I don't remember going to the park…"

Mable tilted her head at her brother, her face a mask of confusion and concern. "You ok, Dipper? It's not like you to forget things."

Dipper rubbed his forehead and blinked. "I…I guess I must have this time. I don't remember anything after leaving the house this afternoon. I don't even remember why I left the house."

Mabel looked at her twin in worry, wondering if he had a weird case of amnesia. Dipper sighed and shook his head. "Whatever. It'll come back to me at some point."

Mabel nodded, relieved, and stood up. "Come on. Phineas and Ferb's mom made hot chocolate and their dad got a fire going in the backyard to make s'mores."

Dipper grinned and pulled himself to his feet, trotting out of the room after his sister and into the backyard.

Candace glanced up from her lawn chair when they entered the yard, studying the boy carefully, just to make sure he didn't remember anything. Dipper didn't so much as glance at Perry or Waddles, who were flopped on the grass a few feet away.

She smiled thinly and popped a warm marshmallow into her mouth, chewing it thoughtfully.

Who would have thought? It was crazy, when Candace really thought about it.

She was a mermaid with powers beyond belief and was now working for a secret organization that employed animal agents to protect their city from the disturbing amount of evil scientists in it.

Candace slumped back in her chair, unable to even think about how crazy the last year and a half had been. She couldn't even count how many people knew about her being a mermaid. She was still going to hide it, try to keep it to just family and friends for fear of another possible kidnapping, but it was going to be a lot easier now.

The red head sat back in her seat, enjoying the warmth of the fire and the sounds of the crickets in the background.

The peacefulness was interrupted when Phineas looked up, grinned, and said, "Hey, who wants to have a marshmallow roasting contest?"

Candace smiled as the other three cheered and joined him immediately. As much as she hated to admit it, Candace didn't think things were ever going to be the same.

But she could dream, right?

* * *

**Poor Candace. Yay Ferb! And the mind erasing worked! But ha-ha, Dipper is so confused.**

**I started school, and I love all of my classes. My friend Jack (the one the merman is based off of) has my lunch, so I'm not all lonely like I thought I was going to be! :D**

**Epilogue is next, and then I'll try to get the Stacy and Jordan story up. And that'll be it for the Secret Life of Candace series. :'(**

**Review!**


	15. I Call it the Epilogue

**EPILOGUE- I know I'm updating this really soon (maybe too soon, for some of you) but I was eager to get the end of this story up. **

**Fanatic97: Thanks so much! I'm glad you liked it!**

**Gamelover41592: Thank you!**

**14AmyChan: I'm glad! And I'm sad it's over, too. **

**Rachealninja10: Thanks!**

**Weirdgirl332: I would do that; I even thought about it. But there's not really an interesting plot, or good way to end it that I can think of, except maybe bringing back a past villain. But that could be potentially boring. But thanks so much!**

**Wii Guy: Thanks for reviewing, and I'm glad you enjoyed them! I hope you start writing again soon! Good luck!**

**Notarealmember: Aw, why thank you! I'm glad you enjoyed this series, even if you aren't a real member. I love all reviews!**

**Thanks guys so much. I seriously love you all for supporting me so much throughout this story line! It's been tons of fun!**

**I have a quick note about my two-shot at the bottom, and then we're just about done.**

**I don't own Phineas and Ferb or Gravity Falls. Sorry it's so short (:**

* * *

_But she could dream, right?_

* * *

GENERAL POV

* * *

Mabel and Dipper left two days later, after getting a call from Stan saying that the Shack had been fixed to the best it could be (which wasn't the greatest; it was the Shack, after all).

They had had a blast for the last two days. Dipper had no idea what had happened that day in the lair, or any day before it (if it involved the agents, of course), and Candace didn't get any calls from Monogram, so she didn't have to sneak away (unlike Perry, who of course had to stop Doofenshmirtz from stupidity).

The boys planned a huge, incredibly crazy goodbye party for Mabel and Dipper, and everyone who came had a blast, even Candace. She only felt a slight urge to bust her brothers, rather than a craving need.

It got a little crazy when the balloon breathing dragon got loose-Candace didn't even want to know how they got him in the first place-but everything settled down eventually.

They went down to the beach for a brief swim on their last day there, Jenny once again lifeguarding, so that Mabel and Dipper could say goodbye to Jordan and Jack (Mabel had gotten pretty close to Jordan in that short amount of time).

When they finally dropped the twins off at the bus station, no one wanted them to go.

"Come on, can't we convince Grunkle Stan to let them stay for another week?" Phineas pleaded with his parents.

Though they wanted very much to accept, Linda and Lawrence knew that they both had to decline their son's request. "Sorry, honey," Linda said, "but Stan wants them there."

Phineas searched his brain for an excuse. "But…but what if something bad happens once they get there? Then you'll wish they'd stayed!"

Lawrence rolled his eyes. "Phineas, Gravity Falls is so tiny that I'm not sure anything bad can happen. Disregarding the mermaid incident, of course."

Dipper and Mabel glanced at one another, their magical backpacks on their shoulders, but they didn't say a word in response to that. Besides, he was right; nothing was probably going to happen for the rest of the summer and they were going to go home bored. **(Oh, the irony)**

Phineas sighed, defeated, and turned to hug Mabel goodbye while Ferb firmly shook hands with Dipper, giving him one of those awkward boy hugs were they pulled themselves in and quickly slapped backs.

The kids switched with each other, and then Candace gave each of the twins a tight hug. "Behave you two," she warned, a smile on her face.

Dipper chuckled, and Mabel grinned. "No promises," the girl said with a wave as they boarded the bus.

Waddles gave a wink to Candace and Perry and hopped up on the bus before Dipper could. The boy glanced back at the family, smiled, and tipped his hat as he clambered aboard the vehicle.

The Flynn-Fletchers waved after the bus until it drove out of sight, and then the five of them piled into the car with Perry sitting on Phineas' lap.

The ride home was silent, and everyone climbed out of the car into the driveway a bit sad, not sure what to do now that they were two kids short.

Phineas and Ferb, of course, strolled into the backyard like always. Candace knew that Isabella, Buford, and Baljeet would be around soon enough, so she went inside and climbed the stairs sullenly to her bedroom.

The girl flopped backwards on the bed and sighed, staring blankly at the ceiling.

Candace rubbed a hand over her forehead, wishing she could do something. The house was already too quiet. She knew for a fact that the rest of the day was going to be boring.

She didn't hear the door creak open, so when Perry chattered, Candace nearly flew through the ceiling.

"Geez, Perry, don't scare me like that!" Candace gasped, sitting up and trying not to look too frazzled. "What do you want?"

Perry smiled lightly and pulled on his fedora. _"Monogram wants you to help me with an underwater mission."_

Candace stared at the platypus, sure she'd heard him incorrectly. "He…he wants me to help you?" she said in disbelief.

Perry grinned widely and nodded brightly. _"Yeah. And don't worry. The scientists are all really dumb. They'll never figure you out. But you should stay out of sight anyway."_

Candace was still stuck on his first statement. "Monogram….seriously?"

Perry rolled his eyes. _"Join me in the lair when you're done freaking out."_

He vanished into her closet and Candace stared at the wall, her mouth gaping and a smile creeping its way up her cheeks.

Candace tossed her cell phone onto the bed and pulled her hair back in a ponytail, her face starting to hurt from smiling so much.

She ducked into her closet and as she descended to the lair, she couldn't help but think that maybe the rest of summer wasn't going to be so boring after all.

In fact…it might even be adventurous.

* * *

**The end of Hiding Lies. Again, sorry it was short, but, you know…epilogue. **

***I want to you guys to let me know EXACTLY what you like about Jordan and Jack, because they're coming back in my upcoming two-shot (plus, the real life versions really want to know!)* Please do that for me!**

**THANKS SO MUCH TO EVERYONE FOR REVIEWING/FAVORITING/FOLLOWING THIS SERIES OR ME! It means so much that you guys enjoyed this series as much as I did. I can't believe it's over!**

**Well, almost. Keep an eye out for my two-shot coming up, called "Catch of the Day." The first chapter will be up in about a week or so. **

**I love you all, guys! Please review!**


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